• About Me
    • Life List
  • Disclosure
  • Work With Me
  • Stock images by Depositphotos

Love and Marriage

And A Baby Carriage.

10 Disgusting Things Only A Mom Would Do

mommyhood

Share20
Pin1K
Tweet
1K Shares

When you become a parent you do so many disgusting things you never imagined.  It’s bad enough that you have to wipe the poop off of someone’s butt for a solid two and a half years or so, but did you ever realize you’d be wearing that poop?

I know dads do a lot of these same things, so don’t take offense gentlemen. It’s just that moms seem to be the ones doing so many of the cringe-worthy acts. It’s as if our bodies somehow evolve when we give birth and suddenly snot and vomit don’t ignite our gag reflexes like they once did.  (affiliate links included)

Here are ten things so profoundly disgusting that only a mom (or an awesome dad) would do them:

10 Disgusting Things Only A Mom Would Do
1.  Wipe snot with your bare hands.  Proceed to wipe said snot onto your pants.  What else are you supposed to do if your child blows snot and you don’t have a tissue?

2.  Smell things to determine what they are.  Is that poop?  Did you just throw up?  There’s only one way to tell.

3.  Stick your hand in the toilet – flushed or not.  Those pacifiers aren’t going to retrieve themselves.

4.  Smell someone’s butt.  The easiest way to determine if someone has soiled a diaper is to shove your face up against it and take a deep breath.  Yep, that’s poop.

5.  Wear baby spit-up with no intention of changing.  Yes, I know I have spit-up on the front of my t-shirt. I can smell it, too.  But what’s the point of changing when I’m going to be spit on again in 20 minutes?

10 Disgusting Things Only A Mom Would Do! Hahahaha! It's funny cuz' it's true.

6.  Pick someone else’s nose.  “Let me get your booger” is a phrase commonly heard at my house.  I see them there and I just have to pick them.  It doesn’t gross me out in the least. (As long as it’s my kid, that is. If you show up at my house, I promise not to pick your boogers.)

7.  Allow your kids to throw up on you.  One time my son was sick and started throwing up on me. I just sat there and held him. I quickly moved into the bathtub before the second round hit but never once did I push him away from me. I held him close and let the vomit soak into my sweatshirt.  He needed to feel comforted much more than I needed fresh clothes.

8.  Investigate poop.  The color, the amount, the texture… these things tell us a lot about our kids’ bellies so it’s an important thing to pay attention to.  It also usually gives us a little too much insight into their last meal. Oh, I can see you had blueberries for lunch.

9.  Clean their face with your spit.  A good spit shine works just as well as a wet wipe.

10.  Catch their unwanted, chewed up food in your hands. “Eww I don’t like this!” and then they lean over and spit the food into your hand before you have a chance to hand them a napkin.  I’ll never understand why my hand is consistently their choice of trash receptacle.

Tell me…what gross thing have you done as a parent? I’m not the only one, right? 🙂

disgusting-things

 

HOW I QUIT MY JOB AND DOUBLED MY INCOME WITH THIS BLOG

Liz Nieman
Liz Nieman

Liz is a just a mom trying to keep it real about how little she sleeps, how often she gets puked on and how much she loves them. You can find her here every day writing about real-mom moments.

loveandmarriageblog.com

Related posts:

  1. How To Survive A Restaurant With A Toddler
  2. The 4 Types of Moms You See At Target
  3. Is Cloth Diapering Right for Me?
  4. Kids Keep Saying They’re Bored?

By Liz Nieman

Comments

    Leave a Reply Cancel reply

    Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

    Recipe Rating




    This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

  1. Beth@That One Mom says

    May 14, 2014 at 6:43 pm

    I am absolutely cracking up. My kids are all teenagers now, but I have done each and every one of those things over and over and over. I’ve dealt with a lot of gross stuff, but after all these years nothing seems all that gag-worthy! I’m always on vomit duty, but the last time my daughter was sick, my husband did actually step INSIDE the bathroom (that’s the closest he’s ever been) and ask if we needed anything. I was going to ask him to wet a washcloth for us, but I was afraid he wouldn’t be able to throw it close enough for me to pick up. ; )

    Reply
    • clarence smith says

      May 26, 2014 at 3:26 pm

      I’ve raised 7 kids…and seen everything u describe…but there is one thing u left out about disgusting things..that is changing a diaper and having ur kid (especially boys) piss in ur face..and also have ur kid crap all over u while changing them

      Reply
      • April says

        May 26, 2014 at 8:26 pm

        That is the funniest thing I ever read! I laughed so hard I cried. Thanks for that. 🙂

        Reply
      • amanda hyde says

        May 27, 2014 at 4:03 pm

        Lmbo!!! Yup….I have had that happen;)

        Reply
      • laura says

        May 28, 2014 at 7:39 am

        ive had all of those things happen..
        but this… i hope this never happens to me ahaha

        Reply
      • Deanna says

        June 2, 2014 at 9:48 pm

        ROFL – one of my kids would projectile poop whenever I changed her diaper – she didn’t do it to DH – just me….

        Reply
      • Katie says

        June 2, 2014 at 10:53 pm

        Yep….during bath….straight shot right into my ear! Baby style “wet willy”

        Reply
      • Sue Lilly says

        August 6, 2014 at 3:25 am

        Oh I remember that one well but i had my mouth open at the time, love is…..

        Reply
      • Brandis says

        August 11, 2014 at 8:29 am

        I definitely agree little boys are definitely good at long distance peeing.. and I’ve definitely had to “catch” if you will the pee before it go all over everything else or place a diaper or hover my hand over to make sure it didn’t get too much all over the place

        Reply
      • chloe says

        December 6, 2014 at 1:41 am

        that happened to mne too 🙂

        Reply
    • Liz says

      May 26, 2014 at 6:21 pm

      Had to give my child an enema.
      Had to hold a tray while he vomited black coal in ER after eating poisonous matter.
      Had to extract a tick from the back of his neck.

      Reply
      • Carol A says

        July 16, 2021 at 9:58 pm

        Liz, omg yes the enema!
        Long time ago was visiting for few days with a friend.
        My youngest hadn’t gone in few days. Decided he would get an enema – the bulb syringe one.
        Fortunately she (nurse) had a bulb syringe.

        While my friend was preparing the warm soapy water solution (that type was given by moms many times), and getting the enema syringe out and cleaned..I placed him on the table on his back on a towel.
        Things were going fine. Ok he is gonna get an enema. The others are playing nice.
        Wrong. He let out a “cannon ball” poop. It blasted out and bounced off my blouse!
        Cleaned that up.
        He got the enema anyway.

        Reply
        • Sue Mom Older says

          August 6, 2021 at 6:03 pm

          When moms need to do something to help their loved ones it should never be seen as gross.

          But have to agree sometimes what is done is ughh. Lol

          My friend was visiting for a few days. When preparing the turkey I got the turkey baster out. For those who don’t know, for basting the turkey as it cooked.

          Her youngest b, think he was 5 yo then, saw me get the baster out. He immediately asked “you gonna give turkey an e nine mo?”

          My friend and I laughed. She told me she has an enema bulb syringe and he has gotten it a few times.

          The turkey baster kinda of looks like an enema!

          I told her so have mine. I got the enema bulb out, red rubber one with black nozzle, and showed it to her.
          Omg she told me she has the same one!

          Only two moms could tell enema stories over coffee!
          Nothing gross. Some funny stories traded.

          May be gross to many but it’s health and healing.

          My ex also thought giving one was gross! And he would leave when knew I was gonna give an enema. She told me her ex was same way.

          Most men are like that. Poopy diapers and they run!

          One time I thought one of mine had gotten into the peanut butter jar since he was carrying it around. With his fingers in it. Nope was poo all over his fingers! Well the jar went in the trash!
          Now that was gross.

          Few days into her visit she noticed the one who asked about the baster hadn’t gone and complained of tummy and head ache.

          That morning we both agreed he would benefit from being given an enema.
          As he got an enema on the kitchen table on a towel, we both made the comment “thank goodness our ex isn’t here to tell it is gross.”

          Poor boy was constipated bad!

          She gave him a second enema later that day.

          Always consult your doctor before giving any home remedies and enema.

          Reply
      • Carol A says

        July 16, 2021 at 10:03 pm

        By the way, love this blog.
        And love the comments.
        Been through many of the same things.
        Hey it’s life.

        Gave many other enemas since that first ever.
        But knows to watch out!

        Reply
    • cyndi says

      August 16, 2014 at 7:17 am

      Yep done every single one! Hilarious! BUT, one more forgotten one. And I know all you ladies have had this happen and who would bother to throw it out?
      “Floaties” in your drink.
      Need I say more?

      Reply
    • Cyndi says

      January 20, 2016 at 6:32 am

      She missed a couple…or maybe I’m the only one? But 1) what happens when little one gets a small cut or scratch on a finger? It automatically goes in my mouth, of course, blood, dirt and all. 2) Moms kiss booboos, blood, dirt, scabs and all…we put our lips right there on it!
      I’ve heard that Momma’s spit had the same chemical makeup as 409. 😉

      Reply
    • Brittany y says

      May 30, 2016 at 12:50 am

      Caught throw up in my hands so it wouldn’t get on the person holding my baby.

      Reply
  2. Leilani says

    May 17, 2014 at 1:36 pm

    This list is spot on! How about this one: wipe crumbs off your childs mouth and after seeing there is no proper place to wipe it (you don’t want to wipe on your clothes if you don’t have to) eat it yourself. Yup, I’ve done that one alot.

    Reply
    • Dawn says

      May 24, 2014 at 7:02 pm

      I have done this many times without even realizing it! I don’t really like for food to touch on my plate, I don’t like certain textures, if I find gristle in my meat I can’t eat the rest, but somehow this was just normal, lol

      Reply
      • kim center says

        May 25, 2014 at 1:32 pm

        I am so with ya on textures!! Gristle is the worst…one bite…im done!!

        Reply
      • Martha says

        May 26, 2014 at 4:24 pm

        Mee too hahaha…if I see it or bite it then it’s game over!

        Reply
    • Checquette says

      May 24, 2014 at 10:11 pm

      My husband does that one for me haha

      Reply
    • WildMommyMC says

      May 25, 2014 at 11:03 am

      I have done everything on this list! I agree though, I don’t know how many times I have eaten crumbs, left overs or food that has been spit into my hand. Something I never would have done before my daughter!

      Reply
    • Corina says

      May 25, 2014 at 7:22 pm

      I do this all the time too especially if my son just spit it out because he doesnt like it. Hey i don’t mind at all, he is my child anyway! Lol

      Reply
    • Becky says

      May 26, 2014 at 11:32 am

      Me to lmao

      Reply
    • Ashley says

      June 2, 2014 at 8:59 pm

      LOL one day without actually thinking, i gave my daughter a bite of mac n cheese that was too hot (oops) and she spit it out, back on to her spoon because it all happened so fast, and i don’t know how i managed to do it but it went right in my mouth haha!

      Reply
    • Cyndee says

      June 2, 2014 at 9:25 pm

      We were out one time and I had given my son skittles and after chewing them up he decided he didn’t want to swallow them so he spit them out in my hand. We were in line to get Patrick Stewarts (StarTrek actor) autograph and there was not a trash can in sight! I totally ate those chewed up skittles my 2 year old spit back out!

      Reply
      • stevi says

        July 29, 2014 at 11:28 pm

        Taking kid to see Patrick Stewart = parenting WIN, no matter what slimy candy you had to swallow!

        Reply
    • Cyndi says

      January 20, 2016 at 6:35 am

      Yep, Waste not, want not! 😉

      Reply
  3. Stefanie says

    May 17, 2014 at 6:48 pm

    Been there, done all that! Ha!

    Reply
  4. Nemi says

    May 20, 2014 at 3:54 am

    I never once thought about it but you are right. We seem to be alright with any gross thing we have to do for our children. I still remember getting up 3 am, change the diaper, feed the baby and expect her to go back to sleep. But no, she has a clean butt and full tummy and she wants to play now.

    Reply
    • Angela says

      May 26, 2014 at 10:56 am

      Was so my daughter also! 3am, time to play!

      Reply
  5. Katie says

    May 21, 2014 at 9:33 am

    Just stopping by from Live with Moore Babies… This list is soooo funny I love it!!!

    Reply
  6. Emma T (@ETusty) says

    May 24, 2014 at 4:57 pm

    Think I’ve done most of these, aside form the catching sick…thankfully my son wasn’t ever really sicky.

    What’s astounding, is I don’t think my husband’s done any of them. He doesn’t even do nose wiping with a tissue…just passes child over to me to wipe. Lovely.

    Great post

    Reply
    • Kelly says

      May 26, 2014 at 3:03 pm

      Man have I caught some vomit, I’ve even caught vomit, stepped in the bathroom to remove my shirt real quick and wash my hands, and held my baby while I took an online accounting test, got 92% too, responsibilities and sick babies don’t wait.

      Reply
  7. Alexis says

    May 24, 2014 at 5:46 pm

    I think I’m in the minority because my husband has done all of these – except he’s useless if it involves vomit. If you even say “vomit” he gags. Lol! This list is brilliant! Funny stuff 🙂

    Reply
    • lauren says

      July 31, 2014 at 2:19 am

      Im not a mum but i am the oldest of 5 and our mum works away from home wile my dad runs a business so i was like the mother i can say i agree i have done everything except vomit haha thats dads job i tend to go the other way when i see that haha

      Reply
      • Cyndi says

        January 20, 2016 at 6:41 am

        You’ll make an awesome mom sweetie!!

        Reply
  8. Dani Tullock says

    May 24, 2014 at 5:49 pm

    Im guilty of 9 out 10 myself btwn my two kids.

    Reply
  9. Liezl says

    May 24, 2014 at 5:50 pm

    This is sooooo funny,and so true! Love it!

    Reply
    • Henna says

      May 24, 2014 at 6:17 pm

      Too funny!
      This is gross, but I have done this many times n still do. When I’m feeding my toddler and she dsnt feel like finishing the bite, I allow the chewed up, soggy saliva filled bite fall into my hands and put it in my mouth. Whoes going to run for a spare plate or a napkin or trash can…?!! My husband is grossed out about this.

      Reply
      • eve says

        May 24, 2014 at 9:57 pm

        so glad i am not the only one who does that i also put the baby food spoon in my mouth to clean it so i can set it down next to me to save a run to the kitchen my husband is so grossed out by that

        Reply
      • Stephanie says

        May 25, 2014 at 5:56 pm

        Hah, my sister does that with her l/o. I get grossed out, but am now expecting my first. I’m sure I will end up doing all of these.

        Reply
  10. Christina Petersen says

    May 24, 2014 at 6:09 pm

    One time my youngest daughter was sick and throwing up and we had a bucket but she was week and I had her in my lap. She puked on me and my husband almost did too. He tried to yell at her and she just looked at him with these sad sick eyes and I said if he didn’t like it he could go we were going to be just fine where we were. When she settled down I laid her on a towel and went to change as soon as I got back she covered me again. My husband left that time. I laughed then and I am laughing now. Later when all was well he told me I was a better man then he ever would be. I just told him I knew that because I was a Woman and MOM!!

    Reply
    • Beverley says

      May 26, 2014 at 6:13 am

      So very true.

      Reply
      • anaonymous says

        July 30, 2014 at 3:04 pm

        I’m a man. I’ve done almost all these things.

        Reply
    • Kevin says

      August 5, 2014 at 8:46 pm

      Maybe in your house. In my house, managing the grossest of the gross is pure dad territory!

      Reply
  11. momof2boys56 says

    May 24, 2014 at 6:13 pm

    When my son was a few weeks old he had a really bad cold & was so stuffed up. He was having a hard time breating & I couldn’t find that nasal aspirator so I just sucked the snot out & spit it in a tissue.
    Also chewed up food for my kids & fed it to them.

    Reply
    • Kisha says

      May 24, 2014 at 6:45 pm

      Just for your future information, you could always blow into their mouth and the snot will come out of their nose. You may get some on your cheek but it won’t have to enter your mouth. That one really grossed me out lol!!

      Reply
      • Liza says

        May 27, 2014 at 7:39 am

        You should never blow into a child’s mouth, especially if their nose is blocked. The air could travel down into their lungs causing overinflation or it could go into their tummies causing them to vomit. CPR is the only time this would be warranted.

        Reply
    • Nasreen says

      May 25, 2014 at 12:01 am

      I’ve done this one too. Today actually lol

      Reply
    • Karena says

      May 25, 2014 at 11:10 pm

      I’ve done both of those.

      Reply
    • Marla says

      May 27, 2014 at 9:22 am

      LOL. I’ve chewed food for my kids when they were babies too. Grossed my husband out no end, but hey, they wanted some pizza too! I figured, she came out of me, so my spit wouldn’t hurt her a bit.

      Reply
    • alyssa says

      May 28, 2014 at 12:24 am

      You win! Yuck!!

      Reply
  12. Theres Just One Mommy says

    May 24, 2014 at 6:14 pm

    Haven’t wiped their noses with my bare hands, but I have checked a few diapers that way and held some sick kids.

    Reply
  13. Tansy says

    May 24, 2014 at 6:45 pm

    I’ve done all of those except cleaning a little face with spit. I draw the line there.
    lol

    Reply
  14. Marissa Casey says

    May 24, 2014 at 6:50 pm

    I will suck snot out of my kids nose if I cant find a nose aspirator and I will chew up food if it is something they want to try and they don’t have any teeth, rinse out the poopy cloth diapers out in the toilet

    Reply
    • Barbara says

      May 26, 2014 at 6:36 pm

      The first time I told my daughter that rinsing a poopy cloth diaper out in the toilet was the way it used to be done,she about lost it. And without gloves. Guess she thought there were always disposables.

      Reply
      • FeAnna says

        July 31, 2014 at 12:28 pm

        I have had to clean nasty poopy diapers in a toilet also. It was the only way back then!

        Reply
    • sahar says

      May 27, 2014 at 9:49 am

      I’ve also sucked out snot from my daughters nose! That’s probably the grossest thing Ive done..but hey girls gotta breathe!

      Reply
  15. Jessica D says

    May 24, 2014 at 7:20 pm

    When my first child, Frankie, was sick and congested, I couldn’t get him to sit comfy enough for the nasal sucker to do its job. I was fearful that he would not be able to breath in his sleep, so I did the only logical thing at the time. I sucked it out myself. Yup. I used my mouth and used only enough suction To relieve his symptoms. A moms gotta do what a moms gotta do.

    Reply
    • Katie says

      July 30, 2014 at 4:51 am

      When my youngest son was a baby, he was projectile puking and it came out his nose and mouth. He couldn’t breathe. I ran for the aspirator as I, frantically, yelled for hubby to do something. He totally sucked his nostrils clean of vomit, snot and all.. twice to get it cleared. Then proceeded to puke on the floor. Good man.

      Reply
      • Andrea says

        July 30, 2014 at 10:30 am

        Hahahahahaha!! OMG!!!! He wins the father of the year award. That’s amazing!

        Reply
      • Crystal says

        July 27, 2016 at 11:20 pm

        BAWAAHAAA. Awww he is a really good daddy.

        My little 1 year old boy ( at the time ) did the same thing in the middle of the night. He was on his back asleep, vomited and was blue when my husband just happened to wake up and hear him thrashing around in the bed. He somehow cleared his nose and throat and he lived. You pretty much do anything when you’re trying to save them.

        Reply
  16. Autumn says

    May 24, 2014 at 7:32 pm

    My best friend is a mother of five and I am still on my first. We were chatting as I was getting ready to go home one day and I had been holding onto a sock my daughter discarded sometime earlier. As I was collecting her things, I picked up her sippy cup and seeing there was some sort of food substance on it, I quickly wiped off the spout with the cleaner part of the sock. My friend just looked at me and laughed and said, “not too many first-time moms do that!”

    Reply
  17. Jessica says

    May 24, 2014 at 7:34 pm

    I remember when my son was 4 months old he had a horrible stomach bug, tons of diahria well when I had him my lap I saw that he was going so I said to my self ok I’ll let him finish then I’ll change him well by the time he was finished I was there comforting him with diahria all over me. But it didn’t bother me one bit because I was more worried for him than my clothes!

    Reply
  18. blimp says

    May 24, 2014 at 7:37 pm

    fathers do exactly the same thing, at least were i am coming from.

    Reply
  19. Debbie T says

    May 24, 2014 at 7:47 pm

    Prior to meeting my adopted daughter, I drove myself nuts wondering if I would be as comfortable with all of the “gross” mom jobs as I was with my bio. kid. Fortunately, it became clear immediately that besides doing “gross” duties, I would also willingly walk through fire for her. Now she’s a teen and even a kiss for her ol’ mom is on her “ewww gross” list.

    Parenting led to my job, working in a preschool, (“birth” to 5 yrs.) I can always tell when I have achieved a special affection for one of our infants – when their boogers get removed sans tissue. (Immediately followed by a major handwashing however.) Smelling butts is practically a job requirement.

    Reply
  20. meredith says

    May 24, 2014 at 8:05 pm

    I remember changing my little guy in the public bathroom at the library. One diaper left and had on his last change of clothes. As soon as the cool aor met his undiapered peenie he let loose a fountain! The only thing handy for some reason was my jacket which stopped the fountain and saved both of our cloths 🙂 looking forward to my second son, due any day now and the laughs he will bring me.
    P.S. the jacket was washable and was an easy clean 🙂

    Reply
    • Irene says

      May 26, 2014 at 12:28 am

      Use baby wipes for cleaning when you should be using clorex wipes or Lysol lol

      Reply
  21. mickey says

    May 24, 2014 at 8:18 pm

    My friend and I were discussing how when our (now college-age) kids were babies, we used to bite their finger- and toenails because we were so afraid of cutting them witht those scissors. Apparently this is considered gross, at least to her daughter who overheard us! 🙂

    Reply
    • Shaleese says

      May 24, 2014 at 11:17 pm

      I bite my babies nails all the time while I’m nursing her, so much easier than clippers. Didn’t know it was gross haha. Those things get sharp, sometimes I will file them.

      Reply
      • Cyndi says

        January 20, 2016 at 6:51 am

        Who in the heck can get a child to sit still for clippers??? Somehow they’re more still and you have more control biting than clipping. It’s just logic really. 😉

        Reply
    • jen says

      May 28, 2014 at 2:44 pm

      My mom told me to do that. My husband and mother In law think its weird but hey, it gets the job done.

      Reply
  22. ashley says

    May 24, 2014 at 8:29 pm

    How about eating a half soggy slobber gold fish out of there hand when they are “sharing”

    Reply
    • Amanda Skyler's Mommy Faulkner says

      May 25, 2014 at 3:44 am

      My son loves “sharing” his cereal.. He will give me a cheerio(orwhatever he is eating), and i just smile, chew it up, and say “thank u”.. 🙂

      Reply
    • Kelly says

      May 26, 2014 at 3:08 pm

      Oh man, shared toddler food is the best, always a bit of dirt or slobber for seasoning!

      Reply
  23. giscela says

    May 24, 2014 at 8:34 pm

    How about cleaning poop out of thr bathtub/shower/baby tub. I couldnt do it…..I dont know why it was different when it wasn’t in a diaper but I gagged. His grandpa got it.

    Reply
    • Pam S. says

      May 24, 2014 at 9:30 pm

      I put my son in the tub with me for the first time, had him leaned against me and saw his body starting to tighten, I called mom (I was visiting from out of state) to take the baby. Just as she walked in, he relaxed and a huge ‘Baby Ruth’ (Caddyshack reference) floated to the top of the water. I’m trying to hand her the baby, but she just reached in and grabbed the poop and threw it in the toilet.

      Reply
      • k.k says

        May 27, 2014 at 6:25 pm

        its not on your list. but this happened to me, with my soon to be 19 yearold daughter. middle of the night breast feeding/diaper change, dont do this in the dark while sitting on a water bed because she started to pee before i got the new diaper under her , i had to wake up dad to help.

        Reply
  24. Jessica says

    May 24, 2014 at 8:37 pm

    I have no kids, but have done several of these things as a childcare worker. Most memorable was when a 2 year old boy was sick and I was rocking with him in my lap sitting on the floor when he suddenly stood up and threw up all over me. I couldn’t do anything but rub his back and tell him his mom would be there soon. Luckily I had a change of clothes in my car and changed. But I went back and held him and within a few minutes he did it again. My husband thought I was crazy because I just changed again and held him again until his mom got there (2 hrs after my shift ended), but it broke my heart and I didn’t even think twice about it.

    Reply
    • Maegan says

      May 24, 2014 at 9:27 pm

      I am also a child care worker with no children of my own. I have done most if not all of those things. Working with those children for so many hours a day, it seems as if they belong to you. You would do anything for them that you would your own children.

      Reply
      • Charlene says

        July 31, 2014 at 10:55 pm

        Awesome that you care for them as your own!!!!

        Reply
    • Charlene says

      July 31, 2014 at 10:56 pm

      That is where I would want my children cared for. That little one was blessed to have you.

      Reply
  25. marvin says

    May 24, 2014 at 8:49 pm

    One time my baby was so sick, she threw up like a fountain and goes into my mouth. And she looks at me wondering (she’s around 6-7mos old) whats that on your face? And embrace her while shouting out loud to my wife… HEEEELLLPPP!!. One of the best thing happened to me during her baby days.

    Reply
    • Kelly says

      May 26, 2014 at 3:11 pm

      My husband was laughing at my sons cute face while changing his diaper once, we all know what happens when cold air meets little boy parts, poor dad got a mouthful on that one!

      Reply
    • Barbara says

      May 26, 2014 at 6:32 pm

      I was holding my son up in the air one time when he let loose and threw up in my mouth. I didn’t lose it but was sure glad I was near the sink.

      Reply
    • Amber says

      November 28, 2015 at 9:44 am

      I nannied for a family for six months right after the mom returned to work from maternity leave. The mom breastfed the baby and pumped milk so that I could bottle feed her throughout the day. One day after I fed her, I began to play with her and without thinking, I lifted her up above my head (airplane style) and she proceeded to spit up right into my wide open smiling mouth. I quickly lowered her back down, laid her on her playmat and proceeded to calmly walk to the kitchen sink to spit and rinse and garggle everything out of my mouth. I have never missed my toothbrush so intensely (I did not live with them, but commuted an hour instead). Half digested breastmilk that wasn’t even mine is incredibly gross. That said, I hope I never do that when I have my own children and it is my breastmilk. Ew.

      Reply
  26. Gwen says

    May 24, 2014 at 9:08 pm

    I have done most if not all of these. Even before having my four kids. Working in child care I had been puked and peed on etc. I remember my daughter ( now almost 15 years old ) was sick and had puked all over her crib. I cleaned her up first and handed her over to her dad while I cleaned up the rest. She started puking again and her dad held her at arms length. I took her from him and cuddled her telling him this is all she wants right now.

    When i was a teen my mom had a baby. I was playing with him by holding him up in the air and he spit up and it landed right in my mouth.

    Reply
  27. Rachel says

    May 24, 2014 at 9:13 pm

    Once, my middle child began walking, he brought me several round balls of “chocolate.”. I willingly opened my hand and accepted them with a smile, knowing full well they were turds from his diaper…

    Reply
    • Pam S. says

      May 24, 2014 at 9:24 pm

      LOL!

      Reply
  28. Pam S. says

    May 24, 2014 at 9:19 pm

    My first baby was always severely constipated. I’ve dug poop out of his bottom before. Then when he was a toddler and wanted a hotdog, he would only eat down to where it met his hand. I got tired of seeing food wasted and thought I’d finish it. YUK! Sweaty hotdogs are nasty! I had to adopt a dog for this chore!

    Reply
  29. Andrea Rust says

    May 24, 2014 at 9:25 pm

    Guilty!

    Reply
  30. Miranda says

    May 24, 2014 at 9:28 pm

    Wow, this is hilarious! The “let me get your booger” made me laugh the hardest, because I usually say that on a daily basis.

    Reply
    • jessica says

      May 24, 2014 at 10:36 pm

      i am ALWAYS telling my daughter i want her boogers; i thought i was the only one! this list def sums up a mommy; daddy does do ALOT for/with her too, but i think in general i prob do the more gross things

      Reply
  31. dave says

    May 24, 2014 at 9:46 pm

    well as a dad i have done all of these

    Reply
  32. Robert says

    May 24, 2014 at 10:11 pm

    I’m a dad, and I’ve done every single one of these.

    Reply
    • Stephanie says

      May 25, 2014 at 6:03 pm

      I love seeing all the comments from the dad’s on here 🙂

      Reply
      • Marc says

        August 1, 2014 at 12:30 pm

        Why did you think we couldn’t read either?

        Reply
  33. Jennifer says

    May 24, 2014 at 10:11 pm

    Put a pacifier, spoon, etc in my mouth to “wash it off” when we weren’t near a sink to wash it.

    Reply
  34. Amber says

    May 24, 2014 at 10:12 pm

    I was conversing with some fellow (single and no kids) co workers the other day about how gorgeous their purses were and then I pointed to my old, frayed, 6 year old coach purse. “It still works, this baby has been through a lot. A couple months ago my daughter was sick and had to do a strep test at the doctor, well I guess the nurse gagged her because the next thing I know it was a fountain of throw up directed right into my purse”. It was the last nice thing from “single-and-no-kids” days. Then both of the ladies together scrunched their noses and said “GAAAAROSS” “I would have just thrown it away. I said “um, no! You better believe I took a tooth brush to that purse and cleaned all the vomit off it, TWICE. All while crying that my poor purse would never be the same but also, my poor baby was so sick”. All and all, I’d give her every last nice thing I owned to throw up in, as long

    Reply
  35. Elizabeth says

    May 24, 2014 at 10:15 pm

    My daughter is older now. I am fortunate that my husband and I shared pretty equally in the nasty, gross things department when she was younger. He didn’t change poopy diapers very often, because they made him gag terribly. It was a fair trade, though. From very early on, if she was going to vomit, she wanted Daddy, and only Daddy.

    Reply
    • Tiffany says

      May 25, 2014 at 4:17 pm

      I have no kids and there’s vomit thing grosses mass out that is the only thing that scares me about having kids.

      Reply
      • Andi says

        May 25, 2014 at 4:45 pm

        Prior to becoming a mom, I had a fairly weak stomach. The smell of vomit or sound of someone getting sick would make me instantly nauseous. I was, like you, concerned that I wouldn’t be able to handle it when I had kids. I now have a two year old and when she was so sick that she was throwing up every 15 minutes, I was the one who held her the entire time. I kept a bucket in the bedroom and held her over it when i could tell she needed to, but more than once, it came suddenly and I just held her, rubbing her back and telling her it would be okay. <3

        Reply
  36. Carol says

    May 24, 2014 at 10:54 pm

    Anyone else pick up a pacifer from the floor and blow on it then stick it back in the toddler’s mouth? Then my husband would babysit while I went to the store and if the baby pooped in her diaper (back when cloth diapers were IN), he’d just drop it in the stool and save it for me! Chicken!

    Reply
  37. Stacy says

    May 24, 2014 at 10:56 pm

    I have done all of these, my husband on the other hand is normally the grossed out one…can’t share food or handle it when snobbery hands or mouth touch him..but the other night I was working overnights and got a call at 1am telling me to get home the 2 year old was puking…when I got home 45 minutes later hubby was sitting in the chair rocking sick kiddo covered in vomit..thought he deserved kudos for that one…

    Reply
  38. Maria says

    May 24, 2014 at 11:02 pm

    ….don’t forget to try and catch your son’s pee , when he’s sleep- peeing somewhere in his room. I know, I know, I can’t “catch” pee, but that’s just my 1st instinct! lol!

    Reply
    • malinda says

      May 26, 2014 at 1:22 pm

      I’ve done that a couple times along with 7/10 on the list lol the joys of being mommy..

      Reply
  39. Amy says

    May 24, 2014 at 11:03 pm

    Hilarious! I stepped in poop today with my bare feet. My potty-training son’s underpants are extra big, for easy on and offs, and sometimes the little accidents that sneak by roll right down his leg before he takes his pants off. It was on the floor, I didn’t see it, and in my foot went. And I only cleaned it up with a flushable wipe. 🙂

    Reply
  40. Megan says

    May 24, 2014 at 11:04 pm

    My son has cronic constipation so the doctor told me that I need to stimulate his anus by circling a thermometer tip in his bum. This is a weekly thing I have to do while changing his diaper. His changing table is by the window and one day (about the time that school gets out) a crowd of teens were walking by his bedroom window right while I was stumulating a BM. The teens were looking at me with a shocked/terrified/disgusted expression…. I will forever be known around the block as THAT CREEPY LADY… Oh the joys of motherhood.

    Reply
    • Erica says

      May 25, 2014 at 12:21 am

      OH MY GOSH this has be ROLLING I can’t even breathe…..

      Reply
    • Judith says

      May 25, 2014 at 10:01 am

      Omgosh!! That’s too funny!! But I can relate. I too have helped my son push poop when he’s constipated. Like fully hands on helping! Never did I think I would do something like that in my life!!! The joy of motherhood!

      Reply
    • Carol A says

      July 17, 2021 at 6:08 pm

      Omg have seen or done most of them on here.
      Many brought back memories.

      None are “gross” to me. They are things moms need to do/learn. doing – giving what is needed.

      Another mom told me she also sucked the snot from one of her kids when she couldn’t find the bulb one time!
      Never gonna do that one!!!

      Megan, Omg same thing here. My youngest, 3 half yo b, was always constipated.

      So did the thermometer in the butt few times on him. It worked.
      I had a large table by the window. Had him on back. On a towel on the table.
      holding legs up in the air. Giving him the thermometer. Like you Megan here comes two of the neighbor teen girls walking by.
      I also got a weird look from them!
      I about died!

      Few days later I forgot to close the blinds/curtains again! Was giving my other one (5 yo b) an enema on the same table.
      He was also on his back on a towel. Legs held up in the air some. Getting an enema from me!
      Omg Here comes one of the teens walking by the window ! I am like “omg forgot to close blinds again!”
      Got the same weird look/stare from her.

      I called their mom. She told me not to worry and same happened to her years ago. She was giving her 7 yo b an enema and one of the visiting girls walked into the room!

      One summer I stayed with my aunt.
      Being like 7 years older than my cousin I remember one time she was giving him an enema.
      She had a large pan of warm mild soapy water and the syringe on the kitchen table. She filled it up and gave him the enema! Then refilled it again! She didn’t say anything to me nor me to her! Omg
      I got out of the kitchen as fast as I could.

      From then on I would watch what pan she used for cooking. Cause I was not gonna eat what was cooked in that pan. I never saw her cook with that pan. Thank goodness!

      I later discovered the pan was kept in the hall closet across from the bathroom. With the rubber enema bulb laying on its side in it.
      Few times I noticed the pan was out of the closet. Airing out. So I knew he got an enema when I was out of the house. So, I made sure that pan wasn’t used!!

      I remember her doing some of the things told on here. But I didn’t think much of it.

      Reply
  41. Michelle says

    May 24, 2014 at 11:11 pm

    Guilty on 10/10 counts of being a mom. I never realized how gross it was being a mom until you pointed it out haha, I’ve got 3 boys ages 11, 9 and 2-1/2. I’ve done some down right nasty stuff in the name of being the mom of boys.. Yuk lol

    Reply
  42. Stephanie says

    May 24, 2014 at 11:14 pm

    I eat ‘floor raisins’ (Cheerios, rice cake pieces…) before my 1 year old can!

    Reply
  43. Kellie says

    May 24, 2014 at 11:35 pm

    Ah yes. The moment when your lying next to your 1yo daughter trying to get her to sleep and she does that cough, that I’m gunna vomit cough. As the fountain erupts you pick her up and cuddle her to you, only thinking of her comfort and making sure she doesn’t choke, whilst your hair, back, clothes and face are covered in chuck. That’s the moment you go ‘I am a mummy’ and then proceed to kiss her beautiful face as you head to the bathroom to clean up.

    Reply
  44. brandy says

    May 24, 2014 at 11:35 pm

    I haven’t done number 9 yet ( though I hope I don’t I HATED it when my mom did it to me) but my kids are still little little (3 and almost 1) so there is still time lol I am guilty of catching throw up or spit up in my hands though lol of shoving finger down kids throat to get whatever object they have now managed to get past me and proceed to choke on (mostly rocks with my 1yr old and it was pennies with my now 3yr old lol) at one time (it will NEVER happen again) my daughter was 3-4 months old and I was holding her in air above my head she was laughing so I was laughing with her til she threw up and it landed in my mouth, normally id have thought id puke but nope I calmly gave her to her dad (who was gagging and laughing ) and went to bathroom to spit it out wash out mouth and brush teeth (3 times) lol I hope to never experience that again

    Reply
  45. Fabi says

    May 24, 2014 at 11:41 pm

    Yep. I’ve licked my 10month olds fingers cause i didnt have a wipe or napkin right there. Lol

    Reply
    • Judith says

      May 25, 2014 at 10:04 am

      Omgosh!! I do this to my son all the time!! And I wonder why he always wants to put his fingers in my mouth! lol

      Reply
  46. Paige says

    May 25, 2014 at 12:17 am

    Did it all except stick hands in toilet, and my kids were not diapers until 2 1/2. Never heard of such an age to still be in diapers. My kids were all in underwear by age 2, one was 19 months.

    Reply
    • joy says

      May 25, 2014 at 2:50 am

      Lots of kids are still in diapers at age 2…where the hell are u from?! Lol

      Reply
      • Annie says

        May 25, 2014 at 7:15 pm

        For real… most kids I know are in diapers at least that long

        Reply
    • Kelly says

      May 26, 2014 at 3:17 pm

      Lucky! My kiddo has sensory issues so while he stopped using them around three, he wore pull-ups until he was 4, now he can handle boxer-briefs during the day, night time he goes comando lol.

      Reply
  47. lamia says

    May 25, 2014 at 12:22 am

    10/10! With three boys, you can’t miss even one disgusting thing. 🙂

    Reply
  48. Sher says

    May 25, 2014 at 12:29 am

    This made me LAUGH because it’s true! Love it.

    Reply
  49. John says

    May 25, 2014 at 12:30 am

    I used to clean my son’s pacifier by putting it in my mouth. I haven’t been puked on but did the rest on list.

    Reply
  50. Annie says

    May 25, 2014 at 1:00 am

    My girls are 23 and 30…and I *still* do #10.

    Reply
  51. Dulcia says

    May 25, 2014 at 1:15 am

    We become Super Mom the day the babies are born. I remember doing those things when my boys were babies. The most gross task that didn’t bother me as much as I thought it would was when my son, who was not yet 1, had diarrhea & a bad diaper rash. The remedy given by our seasoned pediatrician was to clean his rear with my hands, soap & water, (since wipes would further irritate the rash). Ewww! I thought, but I did it. Let him air dry for awhile then applied Flanders Butt Paste. Rash cleared up quickly. Oh the things we will do for our precious little people!

    Reply
  52. Dulcia says

    May 25, 2014 at 1:17 am

    We become Super Mom the day the babies are born. I remember doing those things when my boys were babies. The most gross task that didn’t bother me as much as I thought it would was when my son, who was not yet 1, had diarrhea & a bad diaper rash. The remedy given by our seasoned pediatrician was to clean his poopy rear with my hands, soap & water, (since wipes would further irritate the rash). Ewww! I thought, but I did it. Let him air dry for awhile then applied Flanders Butt Paste. Rash cleared up quickly. Oh the things we will do for our precious little people!

    Reply
  53. joy says

    May 25, 2014 at 2:47 am

    My hubby had to clean up poo in the bath tub bc my one year decided she wanted to poo during her bath. Yuk!!!

    Reply
  54. Jessica says

    May 25, 2014 at 2:48 am

    I was running into town for a quick errand so I didn’t restock the diaper bag, now my sister always told me a “as sure and you forget the diaper bag there will always be disaster” and boy was she right, I had 1 diaper 1 wipe and explosive diarrhea in the back seat of my car. I remember pulling over to an empty parking lot and changing her diaper with one wipe and having to rinse it off with my half empty bottle of water. When I got back home there was poop all over the car, me and my 6 month old baby.

    Reply
  55. Pam Nelson says

    May 25, 2014 at 2:51 am

    I now have several grandkids now, but when I was raising my own kids, my unmarried, childless friend called me and asked me what I was doing. To told her I was on a crap hunt! For those of you who don’t know what a crap hunt is, I will enlighten you. My last 2 kids, who were 11 months apart, were both sick at the same time. You know, diahrea, vomiting, fevers! Well, Erika had a particularly full and disgusting diaper, the contents of which did not stay put! I was literally on my hands and knees on my brown carpet trying to find all the little dribbles of poop she left all over the house! To this day, whenever I see my friend, she will never fail to ask me if I’ve been ob any good crap hunts lately!

    Reply
  56. TeeJay says

    May 25, 2014 at 3:19 am

    Well mommies I do think mine may be the grossest of all grosses.
    My 2.5 yr old son at the age of 12 months learned the taking off diaper game. So if me and daddy overslept just a few minutes over you best beileved that we would be having a poo poo party lol. He would have that poop on him from his head to his toes, in his mouth, all over in his crib, on the floor and oh yes ON THE WALLS. And now we are trying to potty train him. We tell him, when you are done poopooing dont get up just call us and we will come help you blean your booty lol. he tris to help sometimes and forgets to call one of us and starts painting the walls and tolete, his the bathmatts and himself..wheew ans this boy has the most nastyest smelling poop ever…

    Reply
    • malinda says

      May 26, 2014 at 1:30 pm

      My daughter did that and hers was horrible smelling

      Reply
    • Kelly says

      May 26, 2014 at 3:21 pm

      My little guy started sneaking his used diapers into the heat vents, oh my gosh the smell still haunts me, that was not something they included in the parenting class!

      Reply
  57. Amanda Skyler's Mommy Faulkner says

    May 25, 2014 at 3:30 am

    Im guilty of all of them!!! My son is bad bout sittin or playin in a poopie diaper, so that is the most used number… But he also likes 2 give me the food he doesnt want.. I love him so much that I over look all the “gross” stuff.. But I do have a fair share of each of them!!!

    Reply
  58. Kymberlie says

    May 25, 2014 at 4:05 am

    When the little one drops the binky on the ground I pick it up and put it in my mouth before I give it back to him. Don’t this with both my boys. My husband gags lol

    Reply
    • Xay says

      May 26, 2014 at 11:00 pm

      I use to do the same when my boys were babies lol

      Reply
  59. Beka says

    May 25, 2014 at 4:48 am

    ive done all these plus caught poop in my hand when hubby went to hand our ds2 to me in the tub…he was only a cpl weeks old and i refused to have to draw another bath(no more hhot water) so i caught it. luckily my husband can do vomit because once the kids hit 2yrs im a social puker lol.

    Reply
    • Tiffany says

      May 25, 2014 at 4:24 pm

      Me too no puke for me i hope my husband can or no kids for me

      Reply
  60. Andrea9412 says

    May 25, 2014 at 4:53 am

    Stick a pacifier or bottle nipple in your own mouth to clean it after it’s hit the floor or ground and you have no way to wash it off or are just too tired too.

    Reply
  61. scovia says

    May 25, 2014 at 5:20 am

    I have pulled out stuck poo several times, and sometimes it’s too soft to pull out and you wait in frustration for it to come down while said child is saying ‘grammy pull it out!!!

    Reply
  62. Steph says

    May 25, 2014 at 5:28 am

    My baby gets constipated when we travel so I always have suppositories on hand. The first time I had to use them he was 4 months old. I unfortunately was sitting in the wrong spot and ended up covered from chin to chest in a spray of poop. I cleaned it off with a wet wipe and changed my clothes. I suck snot, do the diaper check with my finger, get puked on, clean little fingers with my mouth, eat slobbered on food, etc. the only thing I don’t do is spray poopy cloth diapers because hubby has taken on that job. It always amuses me how very little it matters if he’s wet, peeing, pooing, puking, dirty, or otherwise going to get me any of the above, but if this kid needs to be in my arms, mine are open as wide as my heart.

    Reply
  63. Mary says

    May 25, 2014 at 6:15 am

    A very minor nitpick, and I’m sure I’ll get called a grammar nazi, if not worse… But as one pro writer to another, “dad’s” is not plural, it’s possessive.

    I’m sure it’s just a typo, but it’s a common one and I find it distracting.

    Otherwise, loved this! So much truth. The only other job in which I was exposed to this level of grossness was at a nursing home. Loved that too, in a different way, but I have to say the paychecks that come in the form of hugs are a bit nicer.

    Reply
  64. Lori says

    May 25, 2014 at 6:19 am

    When u don’t eat dinner because u know ur going to eat their half eaten plates of food while doing dishes…sick kids or well, ur totally eating that soggy, half chewed mess and u know it, so why eat ur own fresh cooked meal…there’s no time for that.

    Reply
  65. Lindsey says

    May 25, 2014 at 7:02 am

    When my son was a few weeks old he peed all over me, but after changing him and getting him back to bed I decided I was too tired to care about my own clothes and went straight to bed myself. Lol no big deal

    Reply
  66. Sara @ The Hickman Five says

    May 25, 2014 at 7:25 am

    10 out of 10. Guilty as charged! While on vacation for Mother’s Day (visiting my mom) sans Daddy we were all blessed (minus my son) a wonderful case of food poisoning. My baby girl (4) got sick overnight. At one point she started to cough, spitty vomit hits my pillow and cheek, the wet farts are heard out the other end and the tears just start flowing. As I am comforting her I am thinking … this might just be the grossest thing I have had to deal with yet. When she was done I proceed to clean both of us up and put her in a diaper.

    Reply
  67. Tansytwinkle says

    May 25, 2014 at 8:19 am

    This is really vile but a few weeks ago my mum, who had been looking after the kids, offered to take us out for a meal. While in the restaurant my youngest, 22 months, announced he had poo’d . It was then we realised we didn’t have a clean nappy with us. On checking I saw it was a solid one. Result; we could go to the toilet , empty the nappy and “recycle”. While there I realised I needed a pee so Sat to do my business. It was then I realised that my toddler, without a nappy on was having follow through , right on the toilet floor! Instincts kicked in and I fired my hand out to catch and minimise the damage. I am totally grossed out even now.

    Reply
  68. heather says

    May 25, 2014 at 8:19 am

    I’ve done all these and some. Sickness doesn’t get to me. My son had severe acid reflux. So there was a lot of spit up when he was an infant. My daughter didn’t get sick…. Ever, until she was toddling. She got me ready for my son. This whole list is spot on. It was a great post.

    Reply
  69. Frank says

    May 25, 2014 at 8:27 am

    That was so funny!!! I’ve done all of these ….including eat the chewed up food they spit into my hand!

    Reply
  70. Jennifer says

    May 25, 2014 at 9:02 am

    These are hilarious. I have definitely done them all plus I have caught poop in my hands before so my newborn wouldn’t poop on my bed. Its just what moms do

    Reply
  71. Katie says

    May 25, 2014 at 9:28 am

    When your husband is bathing your child who decides to poop in the tub. Your husband screams your name in horror so you take the stairs 4 at a one only to find a confused kiddo next to his nugget and the only way to get it outta there is with your bare hand.
    Your husband continues to stare in horror and look at you funny the rest of the evening because he wasn’t going to touch it….

    Reply
  72. Ashley says

    May 25, 2014 at 10:28 am

    Disgusting! Thank god I’m never having kids.

    Reply
  73. rachel says

    May 25, 2014 at 10:31 am

    this is way to funny i have done every one of those and i have 3 boys 5 months 5 yrs and 8 yrs lol and let me tell u when u have kids u just dont care, if u get snot on u or what ever. Its funny the things u would do once u haVE KIDS CAUSE i no when i was younger for me to do a few of those things lol i would of nvr done those things but once u give birth, u just dont care i love my kids for life no matter what

    Reply
  74. Ashley says

    May 25, 2014 at 10:57 am

    I was hoping someone else would say they take a bite of their children’s chewed up food! Im a single mother of 1, wipe his nose with my t shirt, if were not in arms reach of boogie wipes. Ive never really inspected my son’s poop, but their have been instances where I’d have to go into my office with a hazmat suit on and clean the walls, chairs, keyboards, carpet, windows because of the poop he smeared. fun stuff for sure.

    Reply
  75. debbi says

    May 25, 2014 at 11:07 am

    a friend of mine was napping and thought her toddler was asleep too….but he wasn’t….he pooped his diaper…took it off…then climbed up on her and sat on her face!

    Reply
  76. Bobby says

    May 25, 2014 at 11:37 am

    I have 4 kids ranging from ages 19 – 1. This Dad has done every one of those previously mentioned and more. I’m normally not a “one-upper” but here ya go – mind you, this was NOT intentional, it was just one of those things that was bound to happen to somebody from changing so many diapers – My now 3 year old was around 9 months old at the time and had her first real bout of intestinal sickness, I was changing her 1/2 loaded diaper and she went again, but it wasn’t gentle, it was like a fountain. My reaction was NOT what a well thought out response would have been…I cupped my hands and caught a bunch of it. I am not proud of this, nor am I ashamed of this, it just is.
    Equally Disgusting Dad

    Reply
  77. Ziq says

    May 25, 2014 at 11:49 am

    I just sat here reading out this list to my partner and we laughed the whole way through. And I have to day this list is sooooo true, we are yet to experience #3. And even the stories in the comments had us in tears!
    I’m so happy he also steps up in a heartbeat with the icky stuff.

    Reply
  78. Emily says

    May 25, 2014 at 12:29 pm

    Becoming a mother has toughened me up for sure. My son taught me early motherhood is messy. Lol. After his umbilical cord fell off I got him undressed for his first bath and as I am carrying him to the tub he fills up my hands with poop and pees on my breasts at the same time. I just about died laughing 🙂 Wouldn’t trade any of it for the world.

    Reply
  79. Cindi says

    May 25, 2014 at 12:48 pm

    Been there done all….especially the vomiting on me….my son is asthmatic and when he was 3 years old I was at the pharmacy getting his prescription filled when he was sick. He started to vomit while sitting on counter while I was paying….I just opened up my t shirt and let him go……..mommys love…..

    Reply
  80. Vicki says

    May 25, 2014 at 1:23 pm

    We have a joke in our family that the boys will ONLY throw up on me when they are sick. I think they wait til they get passed to mommy before they let it go! Must be love!!

    Reply
  81. kim center says

    May 25, 2014 at 1:44 pm

    Pretty sure I’ ve done 8 out of 10. But my husband has done all of them. The one thing he has gone that I could never is….one time our son was gonna be sick (vomit) and I asked him to get a trash can. ..well he couldnt find one so he just cupped his hands together and allowed our 3 yr old son to throw up in them! Our son was in his own bed at the time…I would have had him throw up on the bedding first. But I have to give my husband props has has been more on the receiving end they I have ever been. Our son peed all down him thru his diaper to the point of running down my husbands leg and off his boot at a car dealership. Our daughter had a very explosive incident (poop) all over his side and herself while in a doctor’s office! Yep he is the man!! Gotta love a man who can deal with that and hes in construction! Lol

    Reply
    • Kurta Design says

      January 13, 2021 at 1:09 pm

      Agreed!!! Exactly my words

      Reply
  82. Tammy says

    May 25, 2014 at 1:55 pm

    One I did not see that some may think are gross is pre-chewing food for baby once they start eating solid food.

    Reply
  83. Randi says

    May 25, 2014 at 2:32 pm

    I cut up my kids’ food by biting it and basically spitting it back out. :S What to do when you don’t have a fork or knife? Or don’t want even one extra dish?

    Reply
  84. Linda says

    May 25, 2014 at 2:42 pm

    I’ve chewed my kid’s gum and finished their mints when a trash can was not available. And while holding my baby and eating a sandwich I once licked mustard off my finger. Only it wasn’t mustard.

    Reply
  85. Mr Mom says

    May 25, 2014 at 2:57 pm

    It only seems gross when you think about it afterwards, never while it is happening.

    Reply
  86. Jake says

    May 25, 2014 at 3:15 pm

    Single dad.
    I’ve done these and more.
    Placed a suppository up my son’s constipated rectum.
    Jumped in front of his rear to save the young nurse as she withdrew the thermometer.
    Sat in the bath with him as a baby to wash off “ickies”…
    Please acknowledge Daddies are carrying the load (pun intended).

    Reply
  87. Holli says

    May 25, 2014 at 3:16 pm

    I read this to my teenagers for a laugh. They were all too happy to add to the list on my behalf: smelling armpits and feet to determine WHO smells, popping zits, and picking food out of teeth (as opposed to just telling them they have food in their teeth).

    Reply
  88. Julie says

    May 25, 2014 at 3:26 pm

    I just went through the vomiting with my girls and myself this weekend.

    Reply
  89. Kimmijo says

    May 25, 2014 at 4:22 pm

    My son was diagnosed with Leukemia at 2 1/2 yrs old.. with chemotherapy treatment, I got pretty good at catching puke… with a bowl we grabbed off the shelves in the middle of Walmart, with a plastic bag we dumped groceries out of in the car, with our bare hands, washed them and went right back to enjoying or Lasagna… along with all those other gross parenting things…I’m a pretty proficient puke catcher!

    Reply
  90. Andrea says

    May 25, 2014 at 4:56 pm

    I feel like a momma monkey, I pick at my babies while they’re breast feeding, toe lint, earwax, dry skin, I pick ‘Em clean!

    Reply
  91. Brandi says

    May 25, 2014 at 5:02 pm

    Ummm I have done all of these except directly being puked on,….have gotten splashes of it on me though..and to those that “suck” snot out with their mouth when they have no aspirator..im sorry but that is just really disgusting and I would never do that!!

    Reply
  92. ebony e says

    May 25, 2014 at 6:42 pm

    i was laying on the couch …zoning…watching tv… and my lil one about 1 at the time (hes seven now) walks up to me and indicates that he has a gift he wants to put in my hand…so without a second thought …no hesitation i laid my open hand out in front of him (still lookin at the tv mind you) he drops his gift and waits for my reaction 🙂 i look in my palm and there (of course) is a nice firm TURD laying right in my hand….OMG! he had dug one out of his diaper and “gifted” ME with it! bwahahaha (i was dying inside but had to completely keep my composure cuz i didnt wanna freak HIM out) (but i was Screaming on this inside) now i was already a veteran booger picking,,,but sniffin mommy long b4 this day…But this is one of those rare “nasty” moments that sticks with you…lol Needless to say, potty training took place immediately after the “Great Dookie Debacle”
    Thank You and Goodnight! lmao

    Reply
    • ebony e says

      May 25, 2014 at 6:44 pm

      *Butt-sniffin

      Reply
  93. Lisa says

    May 25, 2014 at 7:11 pm

    As a mother I did all of this and now as a grandmother I am doing it all over again. Some how it is not as bad this time around !

    Reply
  94. Angel Marie says

    May 25, 2014 at 7:14 pm

    My son is only six moths old and I’ve done about everything on this list but I have to say the nastiet thing I’ve ever had to deal with was thinking my son was done pooping and had to catch it with a wipe lolz never want to do that again! 🙂

    Reply
  95. Denise says

    May 25, 2014 at 7:37 pm

    My kids are constantly using me to wipe things on…boogers, left-over pasta sauce, dirt. Anything that is on their faces or hands ends up on me somehow. It doesn’t even bother me any more. I keep Sam’s Club sized Spray & Wash on hand at all times.

    Reply
  96. Nicki says

    May 25, 2014 at 7:55 pm

    I’ve so done all of these things X3 lol. One gross thing I did that my husband could not stand was to check for a soiled diaper (pee not poop) i would just stick my finger right into the side of the diaper…yep needs changed! Sometimes I would get an unpleasant surprise when there would be poopie in there lol. yuck… nothing a diaper wipe cant handle!

    Reply
  97. KerriNZ says

    May 25, 2014 at 8:01 pm

    Worse thing with Kidlet #1 was a major power fountain throw up. That ended up landing down my leg into my flip flops. Kidlet # 2 fresh born baby introduced to his big sister , as i changed his butt & he kept poo’ing. She was icked out , telling me over & over ewwww gross, make him stop. Kidlet #3 Having a shower with her ( few wks old) she throws up, lands on the walls, my hair , every where else that it could land on & just a heads up Breastmilk STICKS. On the list I have done about 8 out of 10 of those , I’ve now become immune lol

    Reply
  98. Michele says

    May 25, 2014 at 8:28 pm

    It really never occurred to me that some of the “normal”, others (without kids or the kids themselves) would find gross. I’m guilty of doing 9/10, plus the gag-worthy sucking the snot out of their nose … it’s amazing what moms will do for their kids lol

    Reply
  99. Kimberly says

    May 25, 2014 at 8:36 pm

    I have done all of these! I think the grossest thing I’ve done is a couple days after my oldest was born, he had peed all over my bed… twice, so I was on my last set of clean sheets. And my sleep deprived self put him on the bed to change his diaper at 2 am and he started to poop mid-change. My first instinct was to put my hand under his butt to catch his poop! Lol. In my head, I was thinking that I can wash my hands quicker than I can wash my last set of sheets:)

    Reply
  100. Bobbie says

    May 25, 2014 at 9:15 pm

    The grossest thing I have ever done was probably manually dig poop out of my youngest daughter. She was so constipated as a baby that it was there and visible and had started to tear her as she was trying to push it out so I had to go in with a glove of course and dig out her poop. Not to mention I have done all the above on this list and not just with my children but with little cousins, nieces, nephews and friend’s children.

    Reply
  101. Jesse says

    May 25, 2014 at 9:17 pm

    Don’t forget having your son pee on you. It when you are about to bathe them and they decide to poop not in the diaper or bathtub but everywhere else.

    Reply
  102. Melissa says

    May 25, 2014 at 10:05 pm

    This doesnt happen to anyone but definitely worth writing about. My son was just born n as the Dr was handing him to me I reached up n as I did he decided it was time to let the faucet run n yup directly into my mouth he peed!!!! I cldnt have cared less though he is now 7 and I’ve have done ago of this n I’m sure alt more… How bout having to push our pull poop outta your babies bum when they are constipated? That’s the newest one for me n I’m on the 4th n last lol no more poop pulling for me soon enough.

    Reply
  103. Raven says

    May 25, 2014 at 10:40 pm

    When my first was born it was the day after I had her I was in the hospital room alone with her and she had pooped her pants so I went to change her and her poop had just left the tar stage and was now runny and seedy she pooped all over me on my close on my face and in my mouth the most descusting thing ever and alls I could think of doing first was get her cleaned up and then worry about myself my nurse had a heck of a laugh when she walked in as I was cleaning my self and told her what happened it was funny but very gross

    Reply
  104. Jennifer Dewing says

    May 25, 2014 at 11:12 pm

    Oh my, this is too funny!!! Being a Mama of 8, I have done them all (& then some)!!

    Reply
  105. Merv says

    May 25, 2014 at 11:13 pm

    I’ve done all that with my oldest and now have a 2 month old and already done half of the list with him lol.
    To add onto the list that happened with me was catching his loose poop with my hand after taking off his diaper and not grabbing the new diaper fast enough to put on him. It sounds so nasty but actually seemed so okay to do because hes my son. Better in my hand than on the bed.

    Reply
  106. Cynthia says

    May 25, 2014 at 11:14 pm

    What about pulling a drooled on cookie out of a child’s mouth, taking a big bite, and giving it back to the child? I did this once because my girl stuck a whole oreo in her mouth.

    Reply
  107. Toni says

    May 26, 2014 at 12:29 am

    In the days before the blue bulb I would suck the snot out of my boogery children’s and baby’s noses if they couldn’t blow. I even did it for some of my grandbabies.

    Reply
  108. Irene says

    May 26, 2014 at 12:29 am

    Use baby wipes for cleaning around the house instead of clorex wipes lol

    Reply
  109. Tiffany says

    May 26, 2014 at 1:55 am

    I have done just about everything mentioned here. LMAO they are so gross but so funny. my grossest thing I have to say my daughter swollowed one of those rubber covers on the earbud head phones and I was like oh $h!t. Then next day I found it in the diaper. I took it out cleaned it off with hot water then smelled it to see if it was fully clean and it smelled groady so then I soaked in rubbing alchol to get the smell off of it and put it back on the earbud. They were my husband’s work earbuds for his cell phone. Those things aren’t cheap.

    Reply
    • kat says

      May 26, 2014 at 2:44 am

      Lmao . I hv 2 siblings 4 daughters 12 grand kids and daycare kids to count along side too many nieces and nephews plus great nieces and nephews not to mention friends little ones and with allll of them together I bet I hv performed each task abt ooohhhh a million times and I am a very particular person .

      Reply
  110. Annie says

    May 26, 2014 at 3:30 am

    10/10! And a few more other parents have posted! It feels so great knowing that I’m not alone in the gross arena. LOL!!!!

    -Mommy of 5 girls. 18,16,7,5,3.

    Reply
  111. Kristine says

    May 26, 2014 at 4:16 am

    I am a new mom and I thought I was the only one that did these things lol! Each and every one of these I have done and my husband looks at me like I’m crazy

    Reply
    • Courtney says

      May 26, 2014 at 10:06 am

      Men don’t understand sometimes lol

      Reply
  112. Kristine says

    May 26, 2014 at 4:32 am

    What about the poops that overflow out of the front of the diaper or the sides and they stick their hands in it and get it all over their face and the carseat?

    Reply
  113. Michelle says

    May 26, 2014 at 7:08 am

    With 3 kids (ages 8, 3 &2) i have done all these things ccountless times. Lol.
    But how about helping out your toddler when hes constipated sitting on the potty screaming because its stuck halfway out? New level of gross IMO. Ya gotta grab it (preferably with a piece of toilet paper) and pull that joker out! Believe it or not ive had to pull a halfway stuck poo out of both my boys. Ugghh. Never did i ever think id have to do that. And not once but twice! Lol. But boy was i a hero in their eyes after it was done.

    Reply
  114. april says

    May 26, 2014 at 7:08 am

    Not sure about any of you, but I’ve got rid some pretty gross hunks of earwax away from my kids ears!!! Disgusting!!

    Reply
    • Kelly says

      May 26, 2014 at 3:32 pm

      Oh my gosh yes! And you always seem to notice earwax when you’re out and about!

      Reply
  115. Tisha says

    May 26, 2014 at 7:39 am

    I also am guilty of almost all. Mom of 5 boys, I do remember one time my husband was changing a dirty diaper, our son dropped his paci, and hubs just immediately picked it up, stuck it in his mouth to clean it off. He realized quickly where the paci fell, right in poop. He jumped up gagging running ot the bathroom. Bless his heart.! I ve been puked on, pooped on, peed on, spit , snot, food all over me, but never had the poopy paci :0

    Reply
  116. Bree says

    May 26, 2014 at 7:49 am

    I’m not even a parent and I have done pretty much all of these things for my nephews who are two and a half right now. They’re so much more important than me feeling gross or anything else.

    Reply
  117. Laura says

    May 26, 2014 at 8:04 am

    This list is awesome I would also add, swirling a qtip with Vaseline up her butt bc she was sooo constipated, sitting in throw up for a 3 hr flight (after having over packed the first 2 times we flew with extra changes of clothes for each of us and not needing them, 3rd time I didn’t pack me a set and she fell asleep immediately after lol), sneezing in my mouth, sucking snot out with a nose Fredia, While givin her butt some air time due to a bad diaper rash, being peed on and letting her just finish before trying to move her lol.

    Reply
  118. Roxanne says

    May 26, 2014 at 8:05 am

    Hmmmm maybe I wasn’t born to be a mom… Poop still makes me gag, vomit is just as bad. I love my kid to pieces but I’d never let him puke on me, never catch puke in my hands… Not without it turning into a crazy barf fest… I also wouldn’t wipe my little mans snot up barehanded or reach into a toilet ungloved! Oh and I would definitely change my shirt if it had spit up on it…
    Ewwwww! Is this really what most mom’s do?? Definitely not me!!

    Reply
  119. Isabel says

    May 26, 2014 at 8:20 am

    I’ve done all of them lmbo but the sad part is before my second was born my husband use to have me pick his nose for him because his fingers were to big lololol story of my life! I’m a St Jude mama so sadly I pretty much do all those almost every day 🙁

    Reply
  120. Christi says

    May 26, 2014 at 8:41 am

    What about let your kids feed you gross things like food they just put in their mouth then changed their mind and decided to share? Sometimes you take one for the team just to see that face light up!

    Reply
  121. Courtney says

    May 26, 2014 at 10:03 am

    I’m a big sister but the two younger ones are 10and 12 years apart from me. So I practlcally helped mom raise them. The only thing I can’t stomach is listening to them actually throw up.

    Reply
  122. Jen says

    May 26, 2014 at 10:54 am

    Great article! Idk if anyone else has done this, but my 11 mo old son sleeps in my bed with me (attachment parenting) and one night recently he had diarrhea which leaked through the diaper, his pjs, and onto the sheet. It was 3am when I realized it and I quickly cleaned him up and put him in fresh pjs. But since I had just changed the sheets the day before I hadn’t had a chance to wash the other sheet set. Soooo of course I switched spots with him and I slept on the soiled part of the sheet (not to mention, it was also very wet since he had saturated his diaper as well). Never in a million years did I ever think I’d sleep on poop, much less someone else’s! The definition of mother should be “selfless”, because that’s a mother! 😉

    Reply
  123. Diary of a Fit Mommy says

    May 26, 2014 at 11:06 am

    LOVE!
    http://www.fitmommydiaries.blogspot.com

    Reply
  124. Derek says

    May 26, 2014 at 11:18 am

    Lol…don’t know what to say about other men, but as a husband and father to a 4yo and a 19 mo I’ve done most of these myself. These are my kids…you do what you have to do !

    Reply
  125. Danielle says

    May 26, 2014 at 11:54 am

    Picking ear wax lol

    Reply
  126. Ruby says

    May 26, 2014 at 12:49 pm

    I laughed at number 5, that is so me!

    Reply
  127. Cindy says

    May 26, 2014 at 2:43 pm

    Yep, I have seen both gym daughter and son in law do most of these.
    But I could add two more: 1) stick your fingers down the child’s pants into the diapers to see if he had pooped. 2) continue to soak your feet in the water your child just peed in!

    Reply
  128. Veronica says

    May 26, 2014 at 2:44 pm

    I’d like to rename the list….MOM TO THE RESCUE.

    Reply
  129. Mary Beth says

    May 26, 2014 at 2:47 pm

    I’ve done everything on this list! My worst experience was 2 summers ago when my daughter (almost 3 at the time) swallowed a quarter. I had to fish all of her poops out of the toilet and search for the missing quarter…after doing this for 3 weeks they finally did a second xray and realized it still hadn’t moved out of her stomach, so she had to have it extracted. Helpful hint: if you ever have to do something like this, a gallon ziplock bag turned inside out will keep your hand dry and clean while fishing for turds. Then you just turn it right side out, close it up tight, and squish away!

    Reply
  130. Paula Glass-Hannah says

    May 26, 2014 at 3:28 pm

    As a SAHM of 3 young boys, I have done all of these…multiple times.
    You didn’t mention putting that “binky” they threw on the ground into your own mouth before giving it back to them. Just in case….Mom spit can cure anything!

    Reply
    • Kelly says

      May 26, 2014 at 3:38 pm

      Soooo I wanted to mention that when we use our spit to “clean” something before putting it in our kids mouth, we are actually introducing bacteria into their systems. I know sometimes it’s all you’ve got, but if at all possible, it really is better to use water, same for chewing up food, using a blender or mashing with a fork is much safer for our children’s dental health. Not judging though, I’ve done it too, I just try not to now that I found this out.

      Reply
  131. Victor Goguen says

    May 26, 2014 at 4:07 pm

    Dad of three boys here, now two are teens other one close behind. Yup, brings back memories.

    I like #6. One of my bad jokes is: You can pick your friends. You can pick your nose. But you can’t pick your friends’ nose. (Doesn’t apply to kids)

    Reply
  132. Glenna Hardin says

    May 26, 2014 at 5:12 pm

    I have done each and every one of these things that you described. But I did not see anything about your child vomiting in your mouth. I have 4 children and I would always hold my children overhead and play with them. Incidentally while doing this they would vomit in my mouth. Has this ever happened to anyone else or, am I alone here?

    Reply
  133. Ashley says

    May 26, 2014 at 5:13 pm

    I know my mom caught my vomit with her bare hands. Me and my sisters went out in the backyard and ate the mushrooms that were growing there and Mom gave me and my sister ipecac and had us throw up in buckets. When she thought I was done puking she put me and bed and went to my sister. I then screamed her name and she came running, holding out her hands, and I vomited into them as she screamed for my dad. I don’t remember much about my childhood, but it’s hard to forget that.

    Reply
  134. tom from Vickery says

    May 26, 2014 at 6:18 pm

    The circle of life never stops! All of us say things like, “I would never do that gross stuff” when your single. I said those very words my self. Guess what? Having a child changes your whole perspective! You’ll do it, and not even think about it!

    Reply
  135. Ashley says

    May 26, 2014 at 6:29 pm

    How about holding your kid’s finger (or other extremity) while they are bleeding profusely while racing to the ER

    Reply
  136. Nola Katherine Trewin says

    May 26, 2014 at 6:35 pm

    I am now 70 years old, and I must say that I laughed when I read these comments. It did remind me of a story that my mother use to tell me. Way back before baby food could be bought in a jar, mothers had to first chew food, such as meat, and then give it to their babies to swallow. Not a disgusting thing for moms, but just interesting. I suspect that they did many, many things that would put our own disgusting experiences to shame. One for me was using cloth diapers. First, I had to clean them out in the toilet (now rubber gloves back then), and then I put them in a diaper pail to soak until wash day. I recall the smell being absolutely awful….but I did it faithfully and seldom saw a diaper rash during my 3 kid stent. Blessings, nk.

    Reply
  137. Nichole says

    May 26, 2014 at 7:25 pm

    Caught poop in my hand because it was much better than the having it go in the bathtub with 2 kids. Kid stood up but not enough time to move him to the toilet.

    Reply
  138. katie says

    May 26, 2014 at 8:32 pm

    These are so true… I never think twice about any of this, but I think you forgot drinking after your child.. I dont know how many times I have taken a drink from a straw that was covered in slobber

    Reply
  139. sjd says

    May 26, 2014 at 8:54 pm

    Funny, but just thought I’d let you know… second sentence you cannot say “off of.” Gramatical error.

    Reply
    • sjd says

      May 26, 2014 at 10:58 pm

      Now that was a type-o! *Grammatical! Ha!

      Reply
  140. Marcia says

    May 26, 2014 at 9:10 pm

    10/10 but I would do them plus anything else to have the child I lost back, those and anything else!!! I’m PROUD that my four children of a single mother ALWAYS knew MOMMA was there for ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING!!!

    Reply
  141. Amber says

    May 26, 2014 at 10:11 pm

    I’ve done all that and more…. Forgot one though…. How about lifting your baby over your head to play and she or he spits up and it lands in your mouth….. Yep! Learned that lesson real quick….. Or newborn with explosive diarreah and it shoots all the way to your clothes… Yep!!! Nothing beats being a Mom!!!! #momlife

    Reply
  142. mely says

    May 26, 2014 at 11:16 pm

    I am a nanny and have done all these things. The one thing I noticed that wasn’t on the list is when your not homecand the kid picks a scab and is bleeding and you have to wipe up their blood with your hands and pour bottle water on it because you ran out of wipes and napkins because you used the last bit cleaning up a diaper. Another one is is picking out ear wax or dirt off the kids fingers and toes. I always keep fingernails short and pluck ear wax lumps I can see with tweezers. One kid I watch hates his fingers getting cut and no matter what I do he refuse for me to do it but I have been able to a few times. I don’t mind boogers and ear wax just not when it’s stuck all over me. I don’t like to feel sticky so I always have wipes with me whereever I go and extra clothes handy at work. One time I had to wash my extra pants because the 2 yrs old threw up again and I had to use my spare shirt as a skirt . When my boss said to come with her to the doctors I said I can’t because my pants are in the wash. she said I didn’t know that was not a skirt. So even though I’m not a mom it feels like it because I been with many kids from the time they were born and helped raise them.

    Reply
  143. Karen says

    May 26, 2014 at 11:31 pm

    Done them all, except let my kids throw up on me without pushing them away…I’m the one who still gags at it. Having 9dc I’m now moving onto the grandparenting stage. My dd explained how gross she thought it was growing up when I would lick my finger to wipe food off of her face. She was determined to never do that when she had her own children. And here she is actually licking her dd’s entire mouth (like mouth to mouth) to clean it up!! How things change!

    Reply
  144. deeann says

    May 26, 2014 at 11:55 pm

    Done them all… Including multiple times of going in to get my son after a nap and he had smeared poop all over his crib. Covered in poop, and then it’s also all over the bed, stuffed animals, everything. My favorite….. Haha

    Reply
  145. Jac says

    May 27, 2014 at 12:29 am

    My daughter had horrible reflux, she barfed in my mouth, eyes, nose, purse…enemas, glycerine suppositories, booger suckers, kitten spit baths…etc etc etc.

    Reply
  146. Steph says

    May 27, 2014 at 12:42 am

    When my daughter was about 2 years old she brought me a little toy teacup full of water. I said thank you, drank it and handed her back the cup. She ran off for a minute to fill it up again, came back, I drank it again, gave it back and then I started wondering where she was getting the water, so I followed her. She ran into the bathroom and dipped it in the toilet!

    Reply
  147. Steph says

    May 27, 2014 at 12:51 am

    Also, several times, I’ve licked or sucked their bloody owies when I didn’t have anything else to stop the bleeding.

    Reply
  148. Martha says

    May 27, 2014 at 7:01 am

    Hilarious and so true! Every wannabe teen mom should read this to know what their future holds. My three are adults, live on their own, one even married and they still call me when they’re throwing up! Only a mama….

    Reply
  149. cheryl gerard says

    May 27, 2014 at 9:47 am

    Here’s one! lol Once at the MS Gulf beach my three year old son got sand blown in his face from a gust of wind while we were playing, it was all over his long eye lashes and he was freaking out with sand in his eyes, which in turn freaked me out to see my baby panicking! What was I going to wipe his little eyes with? We both had sand all over our hands and body from playing. The only thing I could think of that was sand free in these few frantic seconds was my tongue! YES, I licked the sand off of my sons eyes just like a mamma cat! Hey, It worked! What we’ll do for our babies lol

    Reply
  150. Tara says

    May 27, 2014 at 10:29 am

    Guilty of all of them and I
    dont regret a single moment!
    Thankfully I’ve never had to suck snot out of their noses with my mouth!!! My son turned blue from birth to about 8 months old, so I had those rubber sucker things EVERYWHERE, every room, my car, my purse, diaper bag!!! Thank God cuz I really wouldn’t wanna do that one, not that I wouldn’t if I felt it was my only option lol
    But ewwwww!!!

    Reply
  151. rachel blaze says

    May 27, 2014 at 10:35 am

    Dont forget catching spitup in your hand. I got to the point with my daughter where I could recognize a spit up burp from a regular burp and if I had no towels handy and I heard a spit up burp I would reach out and cup my hands under her mouth to catch the spit up so it wouldn’t ruin her pretty outfit.

    Reply
  152. Rachel Mendez says

    May 27, 2014 at 11:34 am

    Ok. So I haven’t ever told anyone about this one.

    I had just got done shampooing my carpets and afterward noticed my little boy needed a bath. I undressed him and sure enough as usual he scurried out of the bathroom to prance around the house naked. I didn’t really pay much attention to it because he does this on the daily. I followed him into the living room and asked him to please go get in the tub. And then I saw it…..the poop face. I knew he was getting ready to drop a big deuce on my freshly cleaned carpet so I did what came natural. I caught it…. Yes… bare handed. Not one of my finer moments. Haha

    Reply
  153. Dawn @ Reveal Natural Health says

    May 27, 2014 at 2:31 pm

    I have done 9 out of 10. Luckily my 2.5 year old hasn’t dropped stuff in the toilet ( but I have and had to fish it out, so I guess that counts too)

    Also, I have been known to eat food that was previously in my tot’s mouth. I also prefer taking her temp rectally because I feel that is the most accurate.

    Reply
    • Herbal Mom says

      July 24, 2021 at 4:05 pm

      Same luck here….haven’t fished out of the toilet..yet.
      Done most of them listed on here.
      Never heard of using mouth to remove stopped up nose and hope don’t have to do that. Ughh
      Guess whatever it takes.

      Glad you pointed out rectal is more accurate way.
      Agree with you taking temp rectally is more accurate and best way. I am surprised at many moms not knowing that.
      Be sure to but rectal thermometer and jar Vaseline.

      For those who don’t know or learning, I recently read that ok to take, even recommended, for 2 yo and older.
      See yours is 2.5 year old.
      I know a mom who takes it rectally for her 4 yo b.

      Always ask your doctor first. Best to check with your doctor/pediatrician for best way for you to take temp.

      I asked dr and was told ok to use rectal for 2 yo and even older. I will take rectal for as long as practical and feel it is best.
      My 3 and half yo b gets it taken across lap way. Laying on towel on my lap. On his tummy. Or on the bed on tummy.
      He has fevers off and on. So I want most accurate.
      I am believer in natural healing and remedies.

      Speaking of gross…I used to take it when he was on back. Holding legs up some. On table. After getting “sprayed” with pee now done laying on tummy.

      Giving an enema ,, now don’t all say gross,,,is very good natural way to reduce fever. Also good to help with constipation.

      Given a few enemas with the rubber bulb syringe.
      Across my lap way. Always works.
      No mess. No big deal.
      Better than giving meds and laxatives.
      Again, as your doctor.
      Not giving medical advice.
      Gave an enema other day.

      Reply
  154. Desiree says

    May 27, 2014 at 6:44 pm

    I too have smelled the bottoms of my little ones to see if the have pooed. Unfortunately I have also pulled their diapers back and gotten a finger full of poo. Ahh the many joys of motherhood.

    Reply
  155. Jenny says

    May 27, 2014 at 6:55 pm

    Can’t stop laughing! Such a true list of things I never thought I would do or be able to handle. These are all second nature to me now.

    Reply
  156. Laura says

    May 27, 2014 at 11:21 pm

    My gross one is when I scooped up my sweet toddler, gave her huge kisses on her fat cheek, and them licked my lips afterwards…realized I’d just licked in something awfully salty…yep, I had just been the victim of a booger sharing. Nope… didn’t gag. Yuck!

    Reply
  157. Angela Horne says

    May 27, 2014 at 11:26 pm

    I am raising three boys and i have done every one of these things u said but the grosses thing i have encountered is my youngest son i was changing his diaper at the Dr office and he was not done pooping and i didn’t know it and it shot right a crossed the room that was a first for me mommy’s do a lot of things daddys won’t

    Reply
  158. Qider says

    May 28, 2014 at 12:53 am

    Spot on. I remember when one of my sons vomit all over me and then he stop (feeling guilty and scared maybe), watching my reaction. Then I said to him, ‘ don’t worry, I won’t be mad at you, just keep on vomit until you feel okay’.

    Reply
  159. Nicole says

    May 28, 2014 at 1:33 am

    no matter where we are if my daughters binki falls, i shove it in my mouth to make sure its clean enough for her! and when she was a new born i was not found of putting warm formula on hey sensitive tongue after putting it on my slightly tougher wrist, si i tasted it myself!!

    Reply
  160. Jenny says

    May 28, 2014 at 7:09 am

    my hubby thinks what I do is the most disgusting. I dunno if it is.. but when my baby is sick with really stuffed up nose, I suck it out with my mouth. works better than everything else!!!

    Reply
  161. Angie says

    May 28, 2014 at 9:18 am

    Feed the kids lunch and not prepare anything for myself — I just eat their left-overs off their plates while cleaning up.

    Reply
  162. Joni Uptegrove says

    May 28, 2014 at 9:33 am

    Oh my goodness Liz, these are hilarious!! I have definitely done all of these, plus anytime I use my finger to wipe peanut butter, yogurt, etc off his face I just eat it if I don’t have a wipe or napkin 🙂 Also, imagine my surprise when I was checking my facebook news feed and your face popped up, b/c my Springfield guy friend had shared this article! Haha small world!

    Reply
  163. Megan Ann says

    May 28, 2014 at 9:36 am

    This is allllll sooooo true!!!
    One thing that I am SO glad I did, but looking back on it thought “wow, that’s pretty gross” was when my niece was eating crackers as a snack. She apparently did not chew before swallowing, and it became lodged in her throat. I quickly jumped up, shoved my finger down her throat, and curved it back up like a fish hook to scoop the cracker out. In doing so, I believe my finger went halfway down her throat.
    Ya gotta do what you gotta do!

    Reply
  164. Candice says

    May 28, 2014 at 9:50 am

    I use to chew my sons food for him before he had enough teeth to get the job done…. my best friend always thought that was the grossest thing that I did… lol….she always said I reminded her of a mother bird….. hahah

    Reply
  165. Tammy says

    May 28, 2014 at 10:01 am

    I’ve had 2 check up inside butts for pin worms on top of everything else mentioned. lol!

    Reply
  166. Ashlee says

    May 28, 2014 at 12:04 pm

    Okay i have done everything on this list except the eating spit out food. I don’t think I could do that. You guys forgot one what about when your child has a nose bleed and you have no napkins or anything so you use your shirt or hand to try and stop it until you get to a bathroom or find tissue. My daughter has nose bleeds frequently.

    Reply
  167. Karen says

    May 28, 2014 at 3:55 pm

    I am not a mother yet, but I find myself doing a lot of these things with my toddler class already. lol When you spend every day with these children they become a lot like your own.:)

    Reply
  168. Victoria says

    May 28, 2014 at 7:59 pm

    My son pulled the string out of a bath towel & swallowed it. And when it came out the other end it wouldn’t pass so Mommy had to glove up and pull it out.

    Reply
  169. tina says

    May 29, 2014 at 2:04 am

    My sisters lil boy didn’t want to put a diaper on so she let him run around naked. Well about 20 minutes later (after him sitting on the potty chair). He goes in his room, poops. Then picks it up and brings it to her. That’s pretty gross

    Reply
  170. Jaseki says

    May 30, 2014 at 3:40 pm

    My mother taught me how to use apostrophes correctly. Guess she had more important things on her mind than poop.

    Reply
  171. Cheyenne says

    May 31, 2014 at 7:21 pm

    What about when you’re changing them, and RHEY ARE NOT FINISHED POOPING!!!! So what’s the first thing that comes to mind when you dont have a diaper under their bottom and nothing in either of your hands but a wipe. CATCH IT IN YOUR HAND!
    I’ve also had a little turd fall out of the diaper after I took it off of him because I’m trying to hurry up before he pees on me, himself or anything else. I then picked it up with my bare hand then placed it back in the diaper!

    Reply
  172. Mary Isabelle says

    June 2, 2014 at 9:07 pm

    Wow! I haven’t laughed like that for a long time! So funny. Although I’ve done most of those disgusting things, my favourite story was one that happened to my doctor.
    My son peed on the doctor’s face. The doctor, instead of putting his hand over baby penis, put his hand over his face and baby just kept peeing. Secretly, this made me very happy, because this doctor had caused me much distress during my pregnancy. 26 years later, it still makes me happy.

    Reply
  173. Mary says

    June 3, 2014 at 10:45 am

    Oh Ladies it only gets worse! As teenagers I have dealt with the threat of a “third” testicle, thank god it was only a cyst… Hemorrhoids, and of course more vomit. AND The mother of them all, dating! Good luck to you all.

    Reply
  174. Marelize says

    June 9, 2014 at 2:42 am

    I once saw a big booger in my baby’s nose and, as all moms do, picked it out… I was in the car, and I didn’t have a tissue… So I put the booger in her mouth!

    Reply
  175. Theresa says

    June 10, 2014 at 7:33 am

    At 2 1/2 weeks my daughter got bronchiolitis and had to stay in I’ve sucked snot out if my babies nose using a nosefrida and my mouth. At 2 1/2 weeks my daughtersthe hospital for 7 days. On the day of discharge the nurse told me it would be a good idea to get a nasal aspirator for when i have to suck the out of my daughters nose. Someone recommended a mommy/daddy powered nasal aspirator. Every one I know thought it was absolutely gross, but from now on it’s post of any baby shower gift I buy.

    Reply
  176. melissa says

    June 14, 2014 at 2:22 pm

    I am not a mother but have done all but two of these things with my niece. Lol

    Reply
  177. Heather @ My Overflowing Cup says

    June 21, 2014 at 7:56 pm

    This is hilarious! Thank you for the reminder that not only are we all in the same boat, but sometimes we just have to laugh. Great post!

    Reply
  178. Kathy @ says

    July 2, 2014 at 8:11 am

    My Husband meet myself and several friends at a restaurant with my son after I had just come back from a Confrence. My husband told me that Connor had said his belly hurt but didn’t elaborate. Son seemed fine ate dinner…… And then while sitting on husbands lap began to unleash a river of vomit. I put my hands out as to try to catch most of it. My hands were not large enough but we avoided the table which we were at the head. My husband an friends were both taken aback and impressed by my automatic response to catch!

    Reply
  179. Jessica says

    July 3, 2014 at 6:44 am

    How about the old pin worm tape test? Tried that one last week. Parenting is so glamorous!

    Reply
  180. Nathalie Viljoen says

    July 30, 2014 at 4:21 am

    My daughter has a tendency to poop in the bath. Im forever scooping ‘floaters’ out of the tub.So much fun 😉 (not)

    Reply
  181. Debby says

    July 30, 2014 at 9:56 am

    One time my son had a stomach bug and we were up all night with him crying and puking. He had already thrown up in the bed a couple of times, and I had ripped the sheets off and laid out new ones. The third time he missed the towel I had spread out and I was so exhausted, I just put a clean towel on top of the puke and we went back to sleep.

    Reply
  182. May Lu says

    July 30, 2014 at 10:16 am

    I have done this a couple of time when my baby girl was sick. She couldn’t sleep well every night because of a stuffy nose. I tried to help her with a nasal aspirator, but it didn’t work. My sister tells me that the best way to suck the mucus out from her nose is “USE MY MOUTH”!! And I did! It was really gross, but my baby girl felt much better. How gross it was!

    Reply
  183. Angeline says

    July 30, 2014 at 12:35 pm

    This list is great. One thing I have done that isn’t on here is suck the mucus out of my daughter’s nose with my mouth. She all of a sudden couldn’t breath and we didn’t have anything around to help us. It’s gross but I would do it again if I had too.

    Reply
  184. Njeri says

    July 30, 2014 at 6:19 pm

    I always lick my kid’s face clean if I don’t have a wet cloth nearby. Once I watching my friend’s kid play soccer, I always carry baby Tylenol with me and somehow it was not safely closed. We are all sitting on a blanket and she goes for the diaper bag and comes out with the meds…she opened it and started looking to see who was seeing what she was doing…my friend looked down and asked if the bottle was half full or she had downed it….I looked at my kid panicked and intincts just kicked it and I held her face up and shoved my tounge in her mouth to feel if I could taste any sweetness of the meds but THANK GOD she did not get past opening it.
    Yummy right!! Lol
    HAPPY PARENTING Y’ALL

    Reply
  185. Greg says

    July 30, 2014 at 8:33 pm

    How sexist! I do almost all of these on a daily basis.

    Reply
    • Jonathan says

      August 2, 2014 at 12:06 pm

      I could really identify with this post and have done all ten things on the list! 🙂 As a dad, I’d really liked to have seen this post called ’10 disgusting things only a parent would do’ as the use of ‘mom’ in the title implies that dads wouldn’t do the things on the list. I know that you may well not have intended to exclude dads so am just giving my perspective on how I felt the title came across. I really like your blog and think that what you say is generally very relevant to dads as well as moms.

      Reply
      • Jonathan says

        August 2, 2014 at 12:52 pm

        Ooops, meant to post this comment at the bottom of the list of comments rather than as a reply to your comment. I also do many of the things mentioned on a daily basis, like a great many dads.

        Reply
  186. Jillian says

    July 31, 2014 at 1:56 am

    Once in a public building with no trash can or bathroom in site my daughter said her belly hurt. . I took off my coat layed it on the ground and told her to aim… it was January and snowing.

    Reply
  187. Darla says

    July 31, 2014 at 10:25 am

    What about picking bugs out of your kid’s head? I had to do that with both my daughters and on two different occasions! Public school is on my sh$& list. haha

    Reply
  188. Marysa says

    July 31, 2014 at 1:36 pm

    I can relate to this list!

    Less gross.. but after feeding the kids baby food, I licked the spoon clean so I didn’t have a messy spoon to pack. Can’t say I’m a fan of baby food 🙂

    Reply
  189. Melissa says

    July 31, 2014 at 4:50 pm

    One you forgot and as a new mom to an almost 5 month old, I am guilty of this WAY too many times: in the middle of the night, during one of many feedings/diaper changes/soothing sessions, that precious little baby decides to spit up on your bed…and you proceeds to wipe up what you can and go back to sleep WITHOUT changing the sheets. Heck, I’m pretty sure I might have slept in my daughter’s pee…sleep deprivation is really fun 😉

    Reply
  190. Jennier says

    July 31, 2014 at 5:37 pm

    My first child and nothing has grossed me out yet. Worried but I’m a strange person and can handle sick enents like wearing pee,poo,puke, whatever really cause it washes off or u can rinse it out. It’s just more meaningful when ur taking one for the team .

    Reply
  191. Aimee says

    July 31, 2014 at 5:46 pm

    This Was Really Good. I’ve Done All Of These But One Thing That People Find Gross That I Did Was Suck Snot Out Of my Youngest Daughters Nose Because The Snot Sucker Just Wasn’t Doing The Job. I Spat It Out Of Course But Either Way People Still Find It Revolting. I Think It Was The Best Way To Help My baby

    Reply
    • Paige says

      July 31, 2014 at 10:01 pm

      You need to try the nose frida. Same concept, less germs and works great!

      Reply
  192. Gina says

    July 31, 2014 at 6:55 pm

    Grossest thing I’ve done….one of my kids swallowed their tooth while sleeping. I was so desperate to find it that I told my kid not to flush the toilet after he poops just in case he swallowed it. So he did. I got my gloves on and smashed the poop in search of his tooth…and no I never found it!!!

    Reply
  193. Paige says

    July 31, 2014 at 9:59 pm

    The other day I took off my son’s diaper, stood him on the bed to go to daddy for a new diaper only to see that he had just began to poop. I quickly scooped him up, catching the poop in my hand and ran to the bathroom. My husband gagged like crazy, I was as calm as can be. I’d rather wash my hand than all the bedding anytime!

    Reply
  194. Heather says

    July 31, 2014 at 9:59 pm

    My 2 year old dd was diaper free with us in the living room. I could tell she was about to poo so I darted to her and caught the poo with my hands. Hubby was completely grossed out. I figured it’s easier to clean my hands than the carpet

    Reply
  195. L. says

    July 31, 2014 at 11:00 pm

    My nephew once puked in my mouth.

    Reply
  196. Cheryl says

    July 31, 2014 at 11:12 pm

    I stuck my daughters both hands in my mouth to clean off the melted chocolate she had gotten all over them, prior to the arrival at the in laws house for dinner! Actually tasted good and it got her hands clean and no one knew better! Fooled them !

    Reply
  197. Amanda says

    August 1, 2014 at 8:05 am

    And let’s not forget about cloth diapering … I did cloth with my first and it was by far the grossest thing on a continuous basis … Whooshing that shitty diaper around in the toilet before wringing it out … Ew. When #2 came along and they were both in diapers, I was done.

    Reply
  198. HowAboutDads says

    August 1, 2014 at 8:55 am

    I have done all of these above, except one, because my daughter has never vomited (that wasn’t spit up). Oh but I don’t count, because I am a dad….

    Reply
    • Marc says

      August 1, 2014 at 9:36 am

      I bet you would never bash mom…It wasn’t fun being thrown up on…I’ll give you that…I wore spit up like a badge of honor

      Reply
  199. Marc says

    August 1, 2014 at 9:31 am

    Wow this list looks like my day…dads do all of this stuff, the sexist title isn’t something dad would do…maybe the title should read…”Mom, bashing dad with sexism again” I do the disgusting stuff I’m my house….I change the diapers…I comfort the sick an get thrown up on…I investigate the poop to see if every thing is working…I smell the butts and clean the boogers…I stay at home with my kids…that’s right I am a SAHD and I do this thanks for the kick in the balls moms….

    Reply
  200. Walther PIiffzer says

    August 1, 2014 at 9:45 am

    So glad I am a dad and never have to do any of these things..I mean after all, what father would?
    #SexisimGoesBothWays #MomsAreTheWorst

    Reply
  201. Amy says

    August 2, 2014 at 1:41 am

    Why not title this post “10 Things Only A Parent Would Do”? My huband scored 10/10 on this list. Me, not so much…

    Reply
  202. Nicole says

    August 2, 2014 at 9:39 pm

    My grandson at 3 months old: I was in the middle of changing a poopy diaper, when more came shooting out – caught it in my hand to keep it off my carpet! It’s what we do!

    Reply
  203. Dave says

    August 4, 2014 at 9:18 am

    Makes me want to make a business blog called “10 Professional Things Only A Businessman Will Do” and include basic functions like “Close Deals.”

    Incredibly sexist title for 21st Century North America.

    I work hard with my kids.

    Reply
  204. thatryanguy says

    August 4, 2014 at 9:06 pm

    10/10. So that makes me a mom rather than a dad? My wife will be surprised.

    Reply
  205. Ian says

    August 5, 2014 at 3:18 pm

    No this list in wrong -plain, unequivocally wrong.

    It’s not just Moms who do these things. Dads do too. I speak from experience. 🙂

    Reply
  206. Amy says

    August 5, 2014 at 3:26 pm

    All these things only mom’s would know about ha ha definitely why our group of friends change as we grow in parenthood. Socializing with ones who understand these things and don’t think we’re CRAZY or GROSS 🙂 how about this thought .. did u spill you drink or is that pee??.. you went in for the whiff when u realize your face now has a lingering smell of pee on it and your more worried about having to clean that same blanket for the third time that day..not even caring that your face was just rubbing across pee lol

    Reply
    • Amy says

      August 5, 2014 at 3:31 pm

      I should have said these are things only mom’s and dad’s understand 🙂 I know my husband has pitched that helping hand in many of these situations 🙂

      Reply
  207. jrod3737 says

    August 5, 2014 at 3:28 pm

    Hooray for moms AND DADS!!! I cringe at the word “only” in this. As a dad, I’ve done everything on this list so many times that I have no way of counting each one. And I’m not a single dad.

    Reply
    • Amy says

      August 5, 2014 at 3:36 pm

      Sorry yes u are right my husband is probably more of the super star then me!! I did mean to put dad’s to!! Bless you for being an amazing father! !

      Reply
  208. Heather Williams says

    August 5, 2014 at 3:38 pm

    I was blessed with 2 boys and I have done all these and then some. When they were babies and they would start to pee, while having their diapers changed, I would just throw my hands into it to keep them from peeing everywhere. And I don’t know how many times I picked up a pacifier dropped on the ground and put it in my mouth to clean it off. (Better I have the germs than them and going without a paci… not an option.)

    Reply
  209. Dana Spencer says

    August 5, 2014 at 4:11 pm

    Or drinking your drink even after you baby decides to spit in it??

    Reply
  210. Kevin says

    August 5, 2014 at 8:53 pm

    10 out of 10. Not a mom.
    🙂

    Reply
  211. Mandy Nel says

    August 6, 2014 at 7:07 am

    I have done all of the above and then some. My youngest suffers from bad nose bleeds so catching blood in your hands, piece of cake. Having to clean up vomit from body,hair and bed at 3am, done! then have to basically sterilise them cos they decided to play with dog poop too!! Not nice, but stuff that parents do. Thanks for the giggle. Loved it.

    Reply
  212. first time mum says

    August 6, 2014 at 7:41 am

    I find myself sharing my food with my bub especially my bananas I let him half suck on my banana then eat it when he’s done

    Reply
  213. Magdel says

    August 6, 2014 at 8:26 am

    I had a epidural caesarian with my second son. As the doctor took him out, he peed all over me, the doctor, the theater personnel and the floor. It was quite a lengthy one and all and everyone was nice and wet! My hubby was quite lucky to catch the moment on photo. We will embarrass him with that photo on his wedding day!

    And yes if you become a mother all those gross things are just normal! Someone has to do it!!!

    Reply
  214. Meghan says

    August 6, 2014 at 10:16 am

    How about sucking snot with your mouth, straight from your kid’s nose, because they were so congested they couldn’t breathe and you had ransacked the house for forty minutes looking for the nose sucker to no avail?

    Reply
    • Amy B. says

      August 6, 2014 at 9:55 pm

      I have a medically fragile son, with cerebral palsy, and I’ve sucked snot out of his nose numerous times! Anything to help him breathe!!

      Reply
  215. Linda says

    August 6, 2014 at 10:43 am

    I’m 9 out of 10 on doing the items on this list. To this day, I have not pulled anything out of the toilet. Ha! Ha!

    Reply
  216. J says

    August 8, 2014 at 8:00 am

    I’m a Dad, I’ve done all of these things…and I’d like to add to the list…today i took my daughter to the male toilet (cubicle). There was no tissue paper and i’d run out, so i used my tshirt – i thank my lucky stars it was a No.1 and not a No.2 – could have been embarrassing to try to explain that one! 🙂

    Reply
  217. Sharon Wallace says

    August 9, 2014 at 2:32 pm

    My 35 yr old son had a burst appendix and was in very serious condition. All the family was taking turns staying with him in the hospital. On one of my overnight turns, he had explosive bouts of diarrhea, I was cleaning him up each time because the nurses couldn’t get there fast enough, so we just stopped calling them. My son is 6’2″ and 250lbs, but he will always be my baby son. You will continue to do whatever it takes to make them feel better when they are so ill, no matter their age. We can now laugh about the “hitty night we spent together…but at the time it was not so funny, just very painful for him and heartbreaking for me to see him suffering.

    Reply
  218. Parks Daniel says

    August 27, 2014 at 12:57 am

    Ohhhh…nice its true only mom can do some revolting things ..Thanks for sharing it..:)

    Reply
  219. Tam says

    November 19, 2014 at 7:46 pm

    I never post comments, but this time I think it’s required. When I first sat down with our lunch, I imagined one of those utopian experiences where my darling girl would sit nicely and eat while I blissfully enjoyed warm food (that hadn’t hit the floor 3 times before it arrived in my mouth). Before I knew it, I was standing in front of her with my hands cupped together catching her vomit before it landed in all the wrong places; including my own food. After the act was complete I stood there, staring at her little green face wondering where I would put the offending contents. As luck would have it, a table of roughly 7-8 seniors had watched the entire show. Had they been more limber, I may have received a standing-O for my speedy reflexes. In a show of solidarity, they gathered all their napkins and sent their most able bodied soldiers to my aid. I was mortified, but relieved to have found assistance in the most unexpected place.

    Reply
  220. Karen says

    April 29, 2015 at 10:00 am

    Yup 10/10 for this list and I cycle through that checklist more frequently than I drink a glass of wine. You can imagine how frequent then… Would all you wise parents (moms AND put wonderful dads as has been mentioned above) be interested in 20 Ingenious Hacks that Make Parenting (Actually) Fun? http://bit.ly/1P6v5cb

    Reply
    • Karen says

      April 29, 2015 at 10:01 am

      P.S. the comments are the best part in this article! Golden!

      Reply
  221. Jamie says

    August 27, 2015 at 10:22 pm

    My husband and I have done everything on the list and more. We have also cleaned poop out of bathtub after finding “floaters” or “murky clouds”. Once my son puked all over my shirt and in my hair along with a few places on the floor on his way to the bathroom and I never bothered to clean myself up until he was done puking, was changed, he was resting again, and I had cleaned up all of his accidents first. Once our two kids got sick with the flu when the youngest was almost a year old and we had one projectile vomiting and the other was pooping like a water fountain on the changing table. My husband had to grab the closest container he saw to catch all the poop while I cleaned up the vomit. As parents we deal with some nasty situations sometimes. I have also cleaned up poop murals on the wall and had kids in sleepers with diarrhea that filled their sleeper pants to where I had to stand them in the tub, unzip the sleepers, then take the shower head with the long hose on it and just rinse them off because they were literally covered in poop.

    Reply
  222. Eva says

    August 31, 2015 at 9:57 pm

    I one time sucked a rock out of his nostril, because he didn’t know how to blow.

    It was that or the ER… again…

    Reply
  223. Emily says

    November 28, 2015 at 4:51 pm

    All of these plus fishing a whole poo log out of the bath!!! My one year old has done this twice to me now in her lifetime (I imagine that she’ll do it again!!) but I have to admit that after I’ve fished it out quickly I let her still play!!! She blooming loves the water

    Reply
  224. Deborah says

    January 16, 2016 at 10:07 pm

    My son was extremely constipated and so I let him sit on my lap facing me. I put a bowl under my legs and spread my legs to open my son’s legs. Then gave him an enema and let him poop and pee on me. He needed me to hold him and help him go so I did. My hubs was totally grossed out and left the room.

    Reply
    • Sue Mom says

      July 17, 2021 at 12:51 pm

      Deb, never gave an enema like you did. But, gotta do what mom has to do to help.

      Done few of the things listed on this blog and comments about.

      Thought I had heard it all from other moms till I read this blog omg!

      One time when giving an enema with the bulb syringe I also got sprayed with pee!
      I had him on the table on his back. Held legs up some and filled the bulb syringe. As soon as I started to squeeze the bulb he let go with the longest ever pee stream ever! My blouse was soaked in pee. Gave him the enema with wet blouse on!

      You learn. From then on gave him the enema laying on his tummy on the towel on the table or across my lap.

      My neighbor friend laughed when I told her. She told me her b did the same thing one time when she was giving him an enema on the table.

      Reply
  225. Heather says

    February 28, 2016 at 4:35 pm

    My son is 15 months old know but when he’s in the bath tub and starts to poop and I can’t get him out fast enough so I just catch his poop so I don’t have to rerun his bath water. Never and I mean never would I have thought I would do this. But being a mom you do a lot of stuff that I never would have done before.

    Reply
  226. Karen says

    February 28, 2016 at 9:56 pm

    Not only catching your own kids puke…. But any kid that is around yous puke also…. While at work the other day a child was walking past and started to puke. I totally caught the first wave in my hand while grabbing the trash can. The non moms were looking at me like I was crazy….

    Reply
    • Rachel says

      July 27, 2016 at 5:19 pm

      I’m the only mom at my work. And some of the things they freak out about make me laugh. I’m like just wait until you have kids, it’s like a whole other world.

      Reply
  227. sherrygay says

    March 31, 2016 at 8:50 am

    have to say ive done all this with my kids as well. i dont know if anyone else has done this hope im not the only one but when my babies were too congested and obviously too young to blow their nose the fastest way to get her nostrils clear is to ( suck and spit ) ive made a few people literally throw up over doing it but it is the fastest way to clear their nasal passage i know its gross but we do what we have to no matter how yuck it is when it comes to our children.

    Reply
  228. Kathleen Marks says

    May 17, 2016 at 11:49 pm

    Ha ha….stuck my hand under my son’s mouth to catch the vomit…

    Reply
  229. Shannon says

    May 18, 2016 at 10:56 am

    This past Easter, while sitting in church, my son sneezed and two long snot rockets shot out of his nose. He turns to me with snot hanging from each nostril. Without even thinking I do the nose-squeeze and pinch the snot off with one hand while frantically digging through my purse hoping to find a tissue. Unable to find a tissue, I sit there for a moment before wiping it off on the church bulletin. Disaster adverted? Nope. He sneezed again and promptly proceeded to wipe his nose this time on the sleeve of my dress.

    Reply
  230. Kari says

    May 18, 2016 at 3:49 pm

    With our oldest, we washed him in the sink, when he pooped, just to be soothing. Clearly I was holding him wrong one day, as I’m washing his cute little 3 week old butt, he simultaneously spit up and peed down the front of me. I was all done washing, another load of poop came flying out, on top of my already soiled clothes. It was worth it, albeit gross!

    Reply
  231. Cassie says

    May 28, 2016 at 12:39 am

    On more than one occasion, I have lunged my hand under the chin of my now 6 month old daughter, Amelia, to catch her spit up after hearing that telltale burp. My success rate is improving remarkably! So is my aim. ?

    Reply
  232. Rachel says

    July 27, 2016 at 5:14 pm

    The first time we tried the no nibble stuff to try to stop my daughter from sucking her thumb was at target and as soon as she put her thumb in her mouth she started to gag so I put my hand out so that she could puck in it. With puck in my hand I just turn to the very young male employee and ask if he had any paper towels. I will never forget the look on his face. He saw the whole thing. Lol

    Reply
  233. Amber says

    July 30, 2016 at 3:30 pm

    We tag team the surprise vomiting at our house. If it is night time & someone is vomiting in their room then as soon as it is over hubster hands the sick one to me and I take him/ her to the bathroom for clean up. Vomited on items get put outside the bathroom door. Warm shower or bath cleans up the child. Fluffy towel & clean jammies for anyone who needs them. As soon as I am done with the kid the bed has been stripped & remade, all vomited on items are in the wash & if necessary the couch is made up for me & the sick child with blankets & basin. They want mommy, so daddy makes sure that mommy doesn’t have to leave.

    Reply
  234. Victoria says

    October 13, 2016 at 7:54 am

    Yup I’ve done it all too! Same with the kids I do childcare for! I have also litterally “caught” puke…yup no bucket or anything insight to capture it with so hands it is….please tell me I’m not the only one who’s done this more than once!

    Reply
    • Joni says

      March 3, 2017 at 3:06 pm

      Haha, done it! Just reflex!

      Reply
  235. Childfree by choice says

    January 15, 2017 at 9:09 am

    Utterly repulsive! You moms might not even notice the major gross factor, but please don’t get mad or offended if we, the rest of population, cringe away in disgust from your child and their bodily fluids in public.

    Reply
  236. fuckyourbabydaddy says

    February 25, 2017 at 5:01 am

    A dad doesn’t need to be “awesome” to do them these days… but these days most of you are asking basically a “step” dad to do these things… which, yeah, for us is fucking gross unless we’ve already done it before with our own children.

    Reply
  237. Joni says

    March 3, 2017 at 3:04 pm

    Done all of these. Also guilty of eating after my kids. My toddler’s Half eaten banana doesn’t scare me! Grosses my husband out, but I can’t see wasting food!
    Also the open mouth kisses from a toddler can gross out some but I love it! Slobber and all!

    Reply
  238. Clarice A. says

    August 15, 2017 at 7:13 pm

    We finially had our 15 year old daughter baptized last easter sunday at easter mass along with other preteens and teens and our daughter and all the other girls wore the traditional white,poofy,top of the knees,short sleeve baptism dress with a matching bonnet,lace anklets and white mary jane shoes.All of the girls had the traditional white cloth baptismal diaper with the white rubberpants on over it and a white tee shirt under their dresses.Our daughter was pigging out at her party on alot of food and then was running around in the back yard chasing the little cousins.The next day,she felt sick and i called her school to report her sick.She threw up in bed then had diariha.Her baptism diaper and rubberpants were laying on her dresser,so i took the rubberpants and put them on her,figuring it would be easier to clean them,then her nightgown and bed sheets! She wore the rubberpants all day and to bed that night and when she had the diarhea,i just took them off of her,washed them out and put them back on her!It worked and was alot less hassle!

    Reply
  239. Macy says

    October 27, 2017 at 9:34 am

    Our neighbors 10 year old daughter made her First Holy Communion last may and i went to her party.The girl was dressed in the traditional,white,poofy,knee length communion dress and veil with lace anklets and the white shoes.About half way thru the party,the girls mom was sitting a couple feet from me and the girls came over to mom and whispered some thing in moms ear.She stood there in front of mom and brought her dress up and thats when i saw she had a cloth diaper and toddler size plastic pants on.Her mom pulled down the plastic pants,unpinned the diaper and removed it,then pulled the plastic pants back up! I couldn’t believe the mom did that that right there in front of of a living room full of people and wondered why the girl was wearing the diaper and plastic pants in the first place.

    Reply
  240. outfizGuato says

    June 1, 2018 at 10:40 am

    co. It consists of fatty acids and amino acids to boost blood flow to the reproductive organs and increase erection size and strength naturally. media reports, both sides have made some last weekend informal conference, which is expected in the week will restart negotiations. The natural oils and natural aphrodisiacs in this herbal oil widen the tiny blood vessels so that more blood flow is ensured to the penis to get bigger and stronger erection. In other phrases, only people chosen clients have priority to pick and buy Hermes goods, otherwise, a single has to wait around.The treatment should be kept as short as possible keeping in mind the response of the patient suffering from shoulder injury. [url=http://www.cheapjerseysnflwholesalechina.us.com/]Wholesale Jerseys China[/url].All eyes will be watching PNG’s move in early November as to what measures it intends to take.com. In case of a tear to the ligament or tendon, surgery becomes important.[url=http://www.cheapjerseysnflwholesalechina.us.com/]Cheap NFL Jerseys From China[/url].[url=http://www.cheapjerseysnflwholesalechina.us.com/]Cheap Jerseys Wholesale[/url]. So is his backup Kendall Thompson. On the other hands, hawks are also strong birds and are much known for their alertness.S.Visit my site:http://www.cheapjerseysnflwholesalechina.us.com/

    Reply
  241. Gauplepes says

    June 1, 2018 at 11:18 am

    It can occur anywhere in the body, including in the male organ.The current account balance, the broadest measure of crossborder transactions, came in at a surplus of 10. The morale in camp is high and we can surpass the 2010 medal haul in New Delhi,” said Soi. It is a natural brain tonic and boosts sperm count.”It will be a tough budget,” former senior PNG and Australian treasury official Paul Flanagan told Xinhua on Tuesday. The problems related to endocrine system are duly treated by an endocrinologist. (They may not be safe if taken in tinctures or encapsulated). [url=http://www.cheapsportsshop.com/]Wholesale Jerseys Online[/url].[url=http://www.cheapsportsshop.com/]Wholesale Jerseys Supply[/url]. Long term treatment care centers, multispecialty hospitals, nursing homes, home healthcare agencies, acute care clinics, physicians’ offices, outpatient clinics, rehabilitation centers, educational institutions and government organizations are among the customers of pharmaceutical staffing and recruiting agencies.[url=http://www.cheapsportsshop.com/]Cheap Jerseys[/url]. If it gets too narrow, the blood has a harder time getting through, which may cause blockage. Fat burners have become widely available, largely because of the fact that they don’t require a medical prescription, so you can even find some weight loss products in brand stores such as Tesco, or Marks & Spencer.”It will be a tough budget,” former senior PNG and Australian treasury official Paul Flanagan told Xinhua on Tuesday.”For more info visit here https://Visit my site:http://www.cheapsportsshop.com/

    Reply
  242. Gauplepes says

    June 1, 2018 at 1:55 pm

    With focus on defending the sixth place finish after the 2010 Commonwealth Games, Kenya is under pressure to improve on its medal tally of 32 (12 gold, [url=http://www.cheap-wholesalenfljerseys.com/]Wholesale NFL Jerseys From China[/url], 11 silver and nine bronze medals) from trackandfield, swimming and boxing disciplines. 18 (Xinhua) Once the world’s fastest growing economy on percentage terms just two years ago Papua New Guinea (PNG) is now facing an election friendly budget despite needing significant measures to stimulate an economy reeling from the downturn in global economy. They do not even have to turn their head to see where their prey is located. It’s claimed that Hermes manufactured the bag, which was developed primarily based on her strategies, particularly for her.With a broad array of suites designed exclusively for the modern corporate employee, Sunchoice Corporate Housing is Florida’s accommodations leader.”I just know that this offense is going to be better than last year’s offense. Bags are a single of the most vital equipment in the earth of trend.It also repairs the damaged tissues and nerves in the male organ caused due to excessive masturbation. Would you like to see it?”On the opposite facet, you can’t just walk in a Hermes store and plainly demanded for a Birkin bag in the past a long time.[url=http://www.cheap-wholesalenfljerseys.com/]Wholesale Jerseys Cheap[/url].[url=http://www.cheap-wholesalenfljerseys.com/]Wholesale NFL Jerseys Cheap[/url].J.The selective amnesia over a disaster out of political or any other purposes is even more terrifying than the disaster itself. The part of the member without the scar tissue stretches to its full degree, as normal.Visit my sitehttp://www.cheap-wholesalenfljerseys.com/

    Reply
  243. Clarice A. says

    January 12, 2019 at 3:10 pm

    The only unusual thing that my mom did was when i was 13 and finially made my First holy Communion.I was in the class with the 2nd graders and mom bought me the traditional,poofy,sleeveless communion dress and veil with lace anklets and white mary jane shoes.She told me that since i was in the class with the little kids and that i was in puberty and still kind of a little girl yet that i would wear an under shirt and rubberpants under my dress just like the little girls wear.She got a pair of the rubberpants in the extra large super size and an under shirt and put them on me the morning of the ceremony.The rubberpants felt different next to my skin and i felt like a little girl in my outfit.I am curious if there are any other catholic women here who made their First Holy Communion and wore a diaper and/or rubberpants under their dress either as part of the dress code,or tradition,or as a parent requirement.Any feed back would be appreciated!

    Reply
  244. PYNK says

    March 4, 2019 at 5:42 am

    Hi I am a mom from Trinidad the craziest thing I did w as pull mucus from my daughter’s nostril with my mouth for her air way to be clear.

    Reply
  245. Jana says

    May 21, 2019 at 7:12 am

    Fantastic read, it really opened my eyes to the situation. My daughter is 3 and asking about sleep overs already. I think we’ll adopt the no sleep over policy! I got into a lot of trouble and inappropriate and dangerous behavior as a teenager at sleep overs. Lots of bullying at sleep overs before I hit teen years. I’ll skip all of the with my little ones and just say no way. Thank you so much!!

    Reply
  246. lisa says

    August 13, 2020 at 6:30 am

    Hi Your post is great and engaging, the content is very practical, and gets people’s attention. Thank you for sharing. click here

    Reply
  247. lisa says

    September 10, 2020 at 3:39 am

    I am so fascinated with the history and stories behind so many of the great wines. I don’t collect myself but the last time that I visited someone I could have spent hours there learning about it all!jeftine karte

    Reply
  248. lisa says

    October 17, 2020 at 3:06 am

    I really appreciate your amazing blog! This is a maximum options provider to all the users and in a single place, you can look most of the techniques for how it will be used in your mobile.Home

    Reply
  249. lisa says

    October 17, 2020 at 8:50 am

    Our fully furnished and well equipped apartments available for short term rental between 1-6 month or long term from 6 month onwards for affordable monthly rentals, together with the comfort of a weekly cleaning service if desired. Everything like electricity, heating, TV, WiFi, washing machine/dryer, water, taxes, common fees are included. Just send us details which kind of apartment you are looking for e.g how many bedrooms, which district, renting period … and we will find the perfect place for you. Just fill out the contact form next to the listed apartment. Budapest short term rentals

    Reply
  250. lisa says

    October 21, 2020 at 9:19 am

    This is my favorite post of the series! I’m glad someone else sees the benefit in having a light over the shower instead of just relying on the vanity lights – you need to see what’s going on in there! Atlanta Galleria Hotels Near Cobb Galleria

    Reply
  251. lisa says

    November 16, 2020 at 3:22 am

    Hi,
    Thank you so much for this wonderful Post and all the best for your future. I hope to see more posts from you. I am satisfied with the arrangement of your post. You are really a talented person I have ever seen.fashion store

    Reply
  252. James says

    December 8, 2020 at 11:44 am

    Your post is great and engaging, the content is very practical, and gets people’s attention. Thank you for sharing.

    Reply
  253. Anderson says

    December 8, 2020 at 3:11 pm

    That is the funniest thing I ever read! I laughed so hard I cried. Thanks for this article

    Reply
  254. steven Fin says

    December 11, 2020 at 5:06 pm

    You moms might not even notice the major gross factor, but please don’t get mad or offended if we, the rest of population, cringe away in disgust from your child and their bodily fluids in public.

    Reply
  255. Ladies Dress says

    January 10, 2021 at 11:36 pm

    Wow, What an Excellent post.

    Reply
  256. word unscrambler says

    April 6, 2021 at 11:39 pm

    An opinion that coincides with my thoughts, I am waiting

    Reply
  257. Essay Writer says

    June 1, 2021 at 5:45 am

    Pretty! This was a really wonderful article. Thanks for providing this info.

    Reply
  258. Carol A says

    July 18, 2021 at 9:29 am

    Great page!
    Well written and great comments given.

    All wanna be young moms should read this page.

    Learn that there is love from mom and “gross” things happen and must be done.

    Blessings
    Hugs

    Reply
  259. lisa says

    April 24, 2022 at 11:47 am

    Hi,
    I really like your approch to connect with your audience. I would love to see more engaging content like this.dame t shirt

    Reply
  260. Jean Wilson says

    September 12, 2022 at 2:09 am

    I can totally understand your situation. The funny reason is that I was the naughty child of my mother. I grew up listening to her about all the things, you have mentioned in your blog. It’s a life-changing experience to raise a child. Lots of time one doesn’t know what to do next? We learn over time. I also search for my little ones online. I am also a last-minute shopper.
    For instance rent products online. I looked for a pram. As my baby was growing up. I had to take her outdoors. There was so much stuff to carry while going home. So it was difficult for me to manage. Sometimes I had to skip or literally put back stuff, just to carry her toward the checkout counter.

    Reply
  261. wordle says

    November 26, 2022 at 10:04 pm

    Your article tells the truth very well, the title of the article sometimes confuses me 😀

    Reply
  262. satta matka says

    December 6, 2022 at 2:53 am

    Thank you for the great piece of information. i would like to share some of the ethical argument topics and exploratory essay topics that you can help you when writing.

    Reply
  263. kalyan final ank says

    February 16, 2023 at 1:47 am

    kalyan final ank this site is best matka final website for all users.

    Reply
  264. lisa says

    February 17, 2023 at 10:55 am

    Real estate is a business that deals with the purchase, sale, and leasing of land, buildings, and other assets. The real estate industry is one of the most important and extensive in the world, and it is growing rapidly.invest in real estate online

    Reply
  265. lisa says

    February 17, 2023 at 11:21 am

    Real estate is an investment that can provide a return on investment, as well as provide a place to live or work. There are a variety of different real estate options available, including buying and selling property, rental properties, land, and commercial real estate. It is important to do your research before making a decision about buying or selling a property, and to speak with a real estate agent to get advice on the best option for you.invest in real estate online

    Reply
  266. Kirby Kestrel says

    July 21, 2023 at 10:24 am

    Haha Lol. That was really funny . XD
    Anyway more fun at บาคาร่าออนไลน์. Thanks me later.

    Reply
  267. Campbell Vappu says

    July 21, 2023 at 10:42 am

    It’s just funny things that happen in many home and many cultures. This just made my day so much. Another one is เว็บตรงไม่ผ่านเอเย่น has made my day too. 😀

    Reply
  268. Eben Sofia says

    July 21, 2023 at 10:48 am

    Some day I will have kids . I wonder if my wife would do one of these . LOL
    May be she will secretly do something like these when I find ผลบอลสด at home.

    Reply
POPSUGAR Select PLUS

How To Start A Blog That Will Make Money

Start a blog and make extra money.
  • PARENTING
  • MARRIAGE
  • TRAVEL
  • Money
  • FOOD
  • Privacy Policy
Easy Crock Pot Dinners feat
Mummy Macaroons
Ginger Dirty Shirley
31 Questions That Really Get Your Kids To Tell You About Their Day
Copyright ©2023, Love and Marriage. All Rights Reserved. Custom design by Pixel Me Designs